Over And Over
by ShinigamiQueen
Summary: "I hate you, Itachi, you suck!" screamed Sasuke, throwing a teapot at his older brother. That's the fifth teapot this year, thought Itachi, ducking as it zoomed towards his head and smashed on the wall behind. BY: ShinigamiQueen and Death - Beta'd
1. Teapots And Posters

ShinigamiQueen: Hey I came up with this story from several dreams and then Death's First Bite and me came up with a plot in the middle of the night :) We're writing buddies.

Death: Yay! See if you can guess what song we were listening to! ;) BTW, Tobi and Madara are DIFFERENT PEOPLE! We love Tobi too much. 3

ShinigamiQueen: We took a long time trying to think of a title, but Death suggested Over and Over, so we listened to the song, and decided it would work. :D

Third POV

"I hate you, Itachi, you suck!" screamed Sasuke, throwing a teapot at his older brother.

_That's the fifth teapot this year,_ thought Itachi, ducking as it zoomed towards his head and smashed on the wall behind.

"Now, Sasuke, that's no way to treat your older brother," Madara warned, sitting in his chair, sipping his cup of tea.

"I don't care!"

"You only see him once a month,"

"I don't care! I shouldn't have to see him for one second!" Saskue howled, his face turning redder by the second.

Itachi sighed and picked up the pieces, before tossing them in the bin in the corner, he picked up the box of tissues and began to clean up the stain.

"I hate everything about you, why do I even visit you?" Saskue screamed, standing in the middle of the living room, pointing an accusing finger at Itachi. "Only when I stop to think about it.  
I hate everything about you, why do I even visit you?  
Only when I stop to think, about you, do you know that I know. You hate everything about me, why do you pretend to love me?  
I hate you. You hate me. Stop pretending to love me." 

Itachi sighed and continued to mop the floor. "I don't pretend, little brother," he whispered.

"Brother, only by name," Sasuke countered, slamming the door as he walked out of the house.

Itachi sat down, put his face in his hands. What had he done to earn his little brothers loathing? Ever since that night… He had been holding him so tightly… Sasuke had been crying and had pushed him away and gone into the shadows….

"Don't take it personally," Madara said, helping Itachi stand up. "First time a girl tried to kiss him, he broke her arm by pushing her away."

Itachi laughed humourlessly. "Her arm?"

"She leaned forward, and he grabbed her arm and twisted it. Needless to say, he's never let anyone in."

Itachi sighed and rubbed his face, before picking up his keys from the table and tossed them in the air, before catching them.

"I'm going to look for him. 'Bye," he called, as he walked out the door.

Madara stood there and his smile slipped off his face. He had succeed in his plan, it only need a little more time…

The door slammed open. Madara hastily sat back down with his teapot as Kisame came in. He smiled up at him.

Kisame looked around. "Sasuke visit again?"

Madara nodded and sipped his tea.

Kisame laughed. "That dude's going to ruin everything in his life," then he picked up a biscuit and went into his room.

XxXItachi could see Sasuke walking quickly away, down the stairs. Itachi then ran down, holding onto the banister, launched himself over it and landed on the balls of his feet. His own face was inches away from Sasuke's un-amused one. Sasuke pulled away.

"Hey," Itachi said.

Sasuke responded with his fingers, then curled them into a fist and drove them into Itachi's stomach. Itachi winced, but the blow didn't even cause him to curl over. Sasuke's eyes danced with fury.

"You were never really good at doing that," Itachi said, musing his brother's hair. Sasuke ducked around his arm.

"It's all your fault," He sneered, starting to run away again.

"What is?" Said Itachi matching his pace easily.

"Like you don't know,"

"No, actually I don't"

"Oh, just piss off."

"Not likely," Itachi took a hold of his arm. Sasuke tried to twist out of it, once his arm was straight; Itachi laid the side of his hand calmly on his elbow, stopping Sasuke from moving.

"If you do anything stupid, I'll break your arm," he warned, quietly.

"Yeah, right," Sasuke scoffed.

Itachi applied a little bit of pressure on to the joint. Sasuke cried out before he could stop himself.

"Yeah, that's right. Let's go back, shall we?"

Itachi turned them both around and they started up the stairs.

"Your gonna pay for this," Sasuke warned, walking stiffly.

"I'm sure I will," Itachi smiled and pushed his little brother slightly, to make him go faster.

XxX Next Morning XxX

Kisame walked into the living room, to see each window had been locked and covered with a piece of wood. The table was upturned and a pile of stuff was pressed against the door, including the TV and sofa. Itachi lay in middle of the floor, fast asleep. Kisame picked up the cold pot of tea and poured it over Itachi's head. Itachi immediately began to cough and splutter.

"What? What? You-" He sat up and punched Kisame's stomach. Kisame raised an eyebrow. Itachi glared at him.

"ffffffffff!" Itachi breathed, as he shook his injured hand.

"Wuss," teased Kisame, helping his up.

"Dude, your stomach is _Really. Hard_." Itachi said, wincing as he stood.

"Hey, what's up with the whole 'lets cover up our windows, block off the door and sleep on the floor' message?"

"Sasuke."

"Yeah, I guessed. But, you know, I kind of want to go outside today. Not that being stuck inside with you is _that _bad," he teased. "'Cos it's be very cool, but I want to go outside."

"Sure," Itachi smiled and went towards the kitchen.

"Err, the mess is in _here_, Itachi," called Kisame. Itachi turned and grinned.

"I know, but you the big guy round here," winking he went into the kitchen.

Kisame started up his usual rant about 'when-I-get-out-of-here-I'm-gonna-'

Itachi smiled as he got their only not-smashed plate out of the cupboard. Last night…

XxXFlashbackXxX"WHAT THE FUCK? GET YOUR HAND OFF ME!" Sasuke screamed as Itachi dragged him from the door. Itachi's neighbour's daughter, Sakura came over to the door.

"_Hey, Sasuke," She said, sweetly, bring her linked hands up and under her chin._

"_Meeh," said Saskue from under Itachi's headlock._

"_Hi, Sakura," said Itachi, warmly, ignoring his brother's feeble attempts of escaping._

"_Let go of my Sasuke! YOU CAN'T JUST SQUASH HIM LIKE A BUG, YOU MISERABLE BASTARD!"_

_Sakura's mother came up behind her, and hit her over the head. "Sakura! What have I said about using words like that?"_

"_Not to,"_

"_And about being rude to Itachi, our neighbour?"_

"_Not to,"_

"_AND mentioning Sasuke?"_

"_Not to,"_

"_Good," Her mother smiled at Itachi. "I'm so sorry, Itachi,"_

_Itachi waved his free hand. "It's alright, Mrs. Haruno." She glared at Sasuke. "AND YOU, IF YOU WANT TO GET OUT ALIVE, YOU WILL STOP MAKING MY DAUGHTER OBSESSED WITH YOU! YOU MISERABLE BASTARD!"_

"_But, mum, that's not fair! How come, when I swear, you can tell me off, but when you swear, I'm not?"_

_They both turned to the left, to get the other's opinion, but found themselves facing a closed door._

XxXInsideXxX

"_Madara, take Sasuke," Itachi threw his brother at Madara, who held him in the same headlock, and began to drag him out to the car._

"_Not again!" Sasuke complained._

_Itachi began to lock all the windows and bar them up with the floor panelling that he ripped up. He then shoved everything up against the door._

_He then collapsed in the middle of the floor, shut his eyes and fell asleep._

XxXEnd FlashbackXxX

Smiling, Itachi returned to the now-normal living room and set the breakfast on the coffee table. Kisame was lying on the sofa.

"Why do I always have to clean this place up?" he said, sitting up and grabbing a bowl of cereal and a spoon, before beginning to eat.

"You barely do it," itachi disagreed, starting his own bowl. "How times a year do you do it?"

"Twelve. And each time your little _brother_ comes, we have to buy new teapots. Dude, why does he always go for the teapot?"

"It's got boiling hot liquid in it, why do you think?"

"Dude, why don't you just ask him not to visit anymore, and just ignore him?"

Itachi swallowed and mused. He couldn't do that; he HAD to make Sasuke hear the truth, even if the truth was going to kill him.

"I don't know," Itachi sighed, putting his uneaten food down.

"Seriously, he's gonna kill you someday,"

"Thanks for the warning," Itachi smiled, humourlessly and stood, stretching.

Itachi crossed the room and went into the bathroom, where he showered and washed his hair. He climbed out and changed into jeans and a new white t-shirt.

Kisame was washing the dishes when he went back in to the kitchen.

"What's on the agenda today?" he asked, leaning against the doorframe.

"Well," Kisame said, turning to face him. "How 'bout we go see Deidara's art show?"

XxXDeidara+Tobi+SasoriXxX

"I'm so excited, Senpai! Your OWN ART SHOW!" Tobi enthused, clapping.

"Shut up," Sasori said, plainly.

"OOH! A BIG POSTER OF SENPAI'S FACE!" He exclaimed, gesturing up to the poster of Deidara's face, which stretched the length of the museum. "IT'S SO PRETTY!"

"Shut up, un " Deidara said, annoyed.

"BUT WHERE'S TOBI'S? HE HELPED ORGANIZE EVERYTHING!"

"Helped knock things over, you mean," Sasori muttered.

"TOBI WANTS BIG POSTER OF HIS SELF, PLEASE SENPAI? PLEASE, PLEASE, _PLEEEEAE?"_

"SHUT UP!" Sasori and Deidara yelled.

Tobi froze in his 'I'm-a-cute-begging-puppy' pose on the floor.

"Un," added Deidara.

Tobi stood and began to laugh.

"Ohh.." moaned Sasori. "Now, you've done it"

"HAHAHAHAHAHAHA"

"Me? I didn't do anything! Un," Deidara protested.

"HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA"

"You did!"

""

"Did not! Un,"

""

"Did to!"

""

"Did not! Un,"

""

"Okay! Let's just GET INSIDE!" Sasori said, slapping a hand over where Tobi's mouth would be and grabbed Deidara's hand.

"Ooh," Deidara laughed.

Sasori felt something licking his hand. He pulled away from the embrace and wiped his hand on his sleeve screaming.

"Never grab Senpai's hand," Tobi said, spookily. "Mwahaha,"

Sasori took a deep breath. "Let's just go inside."

**Death:**** We were gonna have Itachi going out in sweatpants and an oversized t-shirt, but we changed it ;)**

**Play list:**

ALL THE FOLLOWING SONGS ARE BY THREE DAYS GRACE_:_I Hate Everything About You (Sasuke)

It's all over (Itachi)

**If you get out alive (Sasuke)**

**Now or never (Itachi)**

**Home (Sasuke + Itachi)**

**Pain (Itachi)**

**Take me under (Itachi + Kisame)**

**Burn (Itachi)**

**Animal I Have Become (Sasuke)**

**Lost In You (Sakura)**

**Last To Know (Sasuke)**

**On My Own (Itachi)**

**Over And Over (Itachi and Sasuke)**

**Riot! (Sasuke)**

**World So Cold (Itachi)**

**Burn (Tobi)**

**Just Like You (Sasori)**

**Scared (Deidara)**

**Let You Down (Tobi + Deidara + Sasori)**

**Riot! (ShinigamiQueen + Death's First Bite)**

**(Still Death):**__**Those are the songs we listened to when writing and we found that they **_**strangely**_** matched the scenes and characters we were writing about. We've written which characters relate to which song.**

**ShinigamiQueen:**** Have a good day!**

**Both:**** REVIEW OR DEIDARA'S HAND WILL LICK YOU! ;)**

**ShinigamiQueen:**** I think some people would like that.**

**Death:**** lol *winks***


	2. Pretty Fireworks

**Death:**** Chapter Two! :D**

**ShinigamiQueen: ****Woo!**

**2. Pretty Fireworks**

**Third POV**

**XxXDeidara+Tobi+SasoriXxX**

"Never grab Senpai's hand," Tobi said, spookily. "Mwahaha,"

Sasori took a deep breath. "Let's just go inside."

They walked slowly towards the door, with Tobi's constant chatter playing in their ears.

"But, Tobi wants to stay outside! Please? Tobi likes it outside, all the all the pretty birdies singing and blue skies and Tobi can run around all day! Please?"

"It's a cloudy day, and there ARE NO BIRDS FOR MILES!" Sasori said, putting his face close to Tobi's.

Tobi pointed to the pavement. "What about the pigeons, Sasori-danna?"

Sasori looked at the pigeons. "There not birds, they're rats with wings."

"No their birdies, Sasori-danna, they have wings."

"There not birds, they're rats with wings."

"No their birdies, Sasori-danna,"

"There not birds."

"They are too,"

"Tobi. They. Are. Not. Birds!"

"Sasori. Danna. They. Are. Birdies. God. Made. Them. So."

Sasori sighed. "Don't tell me you've become a Jashinist."

"No, but I've been thinking about it," Tobi announced brightly.

"NOOOOO!"

Sasori and Tobi turned to where Deidara's tortured cry came from. "What?" They asked together.

"They missed out my ponytail in the photograph! I look like a girl!"

Tobi walked over and patted him on the back, and whispered in his ear:

"But, Senpai, you already look like a girl,"

"You…! Un."

"Uh-oh, Tobi's gotta run!" Tobi began to back away from Deidara's angry form.

"I GOING TO RIP YOUR HEAD OFF AND THROW IT TO THE PIGEONS! UN!"

"THEIR RATS WITH WINGS!" Sasori protested.

"SHUT UP! UN!"

"Yeah, shut up Sasori-danna," Tobi added. "There birdies."

"Are not!"

"YOUR GONNA DIE TOBI! UN!"

"Not before Sasori-danna admits their birdies,"

"I will never!"

"DO YOU THINK I GIVE A DAMN ABOUT WHETHER THEIR BIRDIES OR RATS? I'M GOING TO KILL YOU! UN!"

"But he has to admit it!"

"No I don't"

"I DON'T CARE IF THEIR BIRDIES OR RATS! YOUR HEAD IS STILL GOING TO BE THROWN TO THE PIGEONS! UN!"

"Which are birdies,"

"Which are rats with wings,"

"WHICH ARE GONNA EAT TOBI'S HEAD FOR LUNCH! UN!"

Tobi stuck a hand in the air. "But, Tobi's just had breakfast! It's not lunch time!"

"Will you just shut up?" Sasori said, bluntly, sitting down.

Deidara began to run toward Tobi screaming. Tobi ran forward screaming twice as loud as Deidara.

"I'M GOING TO KILL YOU! UN!"

"No your not!"

"WANNA BET? KATSU!"

Tobi stopped in his tracks and stared up at the museum. "Oooooh"

Deidara followed his gaze and accidentally ran into him.

From inside the museum, they could hear thousands of explosions going off and the fire alarm going off.

Tobi started jumping up and down.

"SENPAI, THIS IS THE BEST! LOOK AT ALL THE PRETTY FIRE WORKS!"

Deidara stood up slowly and grabbed a fistful of Tobi's shirt.

"You little…! Un," Deidara spat out. "I'M. GOING. TO. SLAUGHTER. YOU. TOBI. UN."

"Stop being so dramatic," said Sasori, pulling out his phone. He pressed the number 5 on speed-dial. The fire brigade came on.

"Hello?"

"_Hello, Sasori-danna. Has it happened again?"_

"Yes. Ten hours earlier than it was supposed to."

He heard the fireman sigh. _"Okay, we're coming over."_

Sasori glanced over his shoulder. Deidara still had a fistful of Tobi's shirt and was screaming abuse at him, whilst Tobi was waving his arms and shouting things about "Pretty fireworks" Sasori rolled his eyes. "Idiots."

**XxXItachi+KisameXxX**

Kisame parked the car and they both climbed out.

They then both began to walk toward where the art was.

Or had been.

Itachi paused on the scene where Tobi and Deidara where clearly arguing and Sasori was the bored viewer. He caught sight of Itachi and Kisame, waved and started coming over. Tobi finally broke free of Deidara's grip and began to run around the building, whist being chased by Deidara, abuse still pouring out of his mouth.

"Hey," said Sasori, standing next to Itachi.

"Hi," Itachi said. "Why are they going crazy?"

Sasori sighed. "Tobi kept going on about birds tweeting and blue skies, so I pointed out that it was a grey day and there were no birds, so he said that pigeons were birds. I mean, are pigeons birds?"

"No, rats with wings" said Itachi, the same time as Kisame said "Yes, birds"

"Thank you, Itachi. Anyway, we began to argue and Deidara began to freak out that he looked like a girl in the poster."

"What poster?"

"It exploded. Anyhow, so then Tobi said that he always looked like a girl, and Deidara began to scream about how he was going to cut off Tobi's head and throw it to the pigeons and Tobi said they were birds, and I pointed out they were rats with wings. So, Deidara was screaming about how Tobi was going to die, Tobi was insisting that they were birds and I was pointing out that they weren't. Deidara said that he didn't care what they were; they were going to eat Tobi's head for lunch. Then Tobi said that it wasn't lunch until much later, so I told him to shut up, and Deidara ran forward screaming. Tobi began to run toward Deidara screaming about how Deidara wasn't going to kill him, and Deidara accidentally blew up the museum in proving that he was going to kill Tobi. That's it."

"Ah," said Itachi.

"Aren't you going to do anything about the fire?" Kisame asked.

"I called the fire brigade." Sasori said, sitting down on one of the picnic benches.

"Good," said Itachi, sitting next to him.

"Aren't you going to stop them?" Kisame asked, gesturing to the forms of Deidara and Tobi still screaming and running around the burning museum.

"No, we've got to make them tired. So leave them." Said Sasori.

"Okay," Kisame sat next to Itachi. "I got five on that Deidara goes on the longest."

"No way, Tobi's gonna keep going until the sun goes down." Itachi chuckled. _At least I have one use for my idiot cousin, he _thought to himself.

"Not when Deidei's in a murderous state. He'll win."

Itachi snorted. "No way. Tobi all the way."

"Your on." Kisame relaxed.

"Sasori?" asked Itachi.

"I don't care. Just so long as they both are quiet tonight."

**XxXDeidara+TobiXxX**

"I'M GONNA GET YOU TOBI! UN!"

"No way, Senpai."

"IT'S ALL YOUR FAULT, YOU LITTLE PIECE OF SHIT! UN!"

"Now, Senpai, it's not very nice to call people little pieces of shit!"

"IT'S NOT VERY NICE TO BLOW UP OTHER PEOPLE'S ART SHOWS! UN!"

"It's not my fault!"

"IT IS! UN!"

"LOOK SENPAI! A RED TRUCK COME TO RUN OVER THE BIRDIES!"

"Their rats with wings!" Sasori called over.

"THEIR BIRDIES! And the red truck didn't hit any!" Tobi moaned.

"THERE ARE BETTER THING TO CRY ABOUT THAN WHETHER A RED TRUCK RAN OVER ANY BIRDS! UN!"

"Rats with wings."

"LIKE MY ART SHOW, FOR ONE! UN!"

Water than began to sprinkle down on them. Cold water.

"I HATE COLD WATER! I HATE BEING COLD! ARGHHHHHH! UN!"

"Yeah! Water!" Tobi danced around.

"OH, CRAP MY HAIR! ARGHHHHHH! UN!"

"Oh, Senpai don't worry about your hair, you'll still look like a girl."

Deidara stared at Tobi from, his wet hair sticking to his face and head like a seal.

"You, know, Tobi," he spat out.

"What? What? Tell Tobi!" He jumped excitedly, his hair paste to his mask.

"I hate you. un"

"_Wow_," He said, sweetly, bring his linked hands up and under his chin. "That amazing! Senpai, your so awesome! Tobi loves you."

"Huh. Un."

"You still gonna chase Tobi?"

"You bet your stupid lollipop mask I will. Un."

"Tobi better run, then, right?"

"Dead right, lollipop."

Tobi began to run toward the bench where Itachi, Kisame and Sasori where sitting, Deidara running almost along side him.

"COME ON TOBI! FALL OVER!" yelled Kisame, as Itachi yelled; "COME ON DEIDEI! FALL OVER!"

Sasori stuck out his foot, and Tobi and Deidara fell over it, landing on the ground at the same time.

"I win," announced Itachi and Kisame simultaneously. They then looked at each other. "You do so not!"

"Tobi wins!" said Tobi cheerfully, getting off the floor. Deidara growled. Sasori held out a hand, which Deidara took and Sasori pulled him off the floor.

"Let's go home," said Kisame.

"Can Tobi come too? PLEASE?"

"Fine," said Itachi, then looked at Deidara and Sasori. "You guys too?"

"Sure," said Sasori.

"Fine, but I'm not going anywhere near that art murderer." Deidara said.

"I thought you liked your art exploding?" said Kisame, innocently, trying to fight Tobi off, who had jumped on his back yelling: "Piggyback!"

"I do, but it was supposed to exploded ten hours from now and WHEN PEOPLE CAN SEE IT! un"

"Right, well, come on," Kisame said, giving up on Tobi and allowed him to have a piggyback.

Sasori walked behind them, looking bored.

Itachi walked beside Deidara. He nudged him slightly with his elbow. Deidara turned to face him.

"Piggyback Deidei?" He smirked.

Deidara smiled, caught Itachi in a headlock and ruffled his hair. Laughing, Itachi pulled out with ease.

"Whatever," Deidara said, rolling his eyes.

"A guy can, dream, right?"

**Death:**** I like that last line. It made me laugh ^_^ Maybe because I wrote it…?**

**ShinigamiQueen:**** *putting head in hands* Think of the pairings… The fangirls'll go mad.**

**Death: *****winks* Bahahaha**

**Both: ****REVIEW PLEASE! (Or Tobi'll set his birdies on you. (****Sasori:**** Rats with wings!))**


	3. Date with Water Balloons

**ShinigamiQueen: ****Chapter three! **

**Death:**** Hey everybody! Y'all okay? XD I love the song that's playing, don't you?**

**ShinigamiQueen:**** What is it?**

**Death:**** Let It Lie ~ Three Days Grace**

**ShinigamiQueen: ****Oh, yeah. *Smiles sheepishly***

**Death:**** Bahahaha **

**ShinigamiQueen: ****Shut up, or I'll set my weasels on you.**

**Death:**** Lots of Itachi's *daydream* Oooh…**

**ShinigamiQueen:**** You have a dirty mind! You've read too many lemons. **

**Death:**** Yeah, whatever. Can we get back to the story? This whole page is gonna be taken up by our random sayings, dude.**

**ShinigamiQueen:**** Go on, I'm waiting.**

**Death:**** *rolls eyes* You impatient girl… **

**3. Date With water Balloons**

**XxXItachi+Kisame+Sasori+(angry) Deidara+TobiXxX**

**XxXThe FlatXxX**

"Itachi, are you having a mid-life crisis?" Tobi asked, from sitting on the coffee table, surrounded by all their drinks.They all stared at him, bemused from the sofas.

"Just because I have lines on my face, DOESN'T MEAN I'M THAT OLD!" itachi sighed. "And they're because of Sasuke."

"Your mad little brother?"

"HE'S NOT MAD!"

"Itachi, he's tries to kill you with a teapot ever time he comes round. Doesn't that strike you as a little bit odd?" Tobi said, his face inches away from Itachi's. It reminded Itachi of the other day when Sasuke's face had been inches away from his own. How different the two memories were. He shook the thought away.

Tobi stuck his chin out, defiantly. Itachi grimaced and pushed his face away.

"If I wasn't wearing a mask, I'd be sticking my tongue out at you."

"If you weren't wearing a mask, you'd have a face that would be purple," said Deidara, from the corner of the sofa.

Tobi began to bounce. "Sasori, Sasori, what does that mean? What does he mean?"

Sasori face-palmed.

**(****Both:**** *face-palm* Hahaha *head-desk* Hahaheeheehohohaha) **

"Where are those voices coming from, Senpai?"

Deidara sighed. "What are they saying?"

"Well, they were face-palming, then going 'Hahaha' then they were head-desking then going 'Hahaheeheehohohaha' Senpai."

"Your imagining things, Tobi."

"Ohh…" Tobi drooped.

"If you think it looks bad now, you should seen it this morning," Kisame said, to fill the awkward silence. "I walked into the living room, to see each window had been locked and covered with a piece of wood. The table was upturned and a pile of stuff was pressed against the door, including the TV and sofa. Itachi lay in middle of the floor, fast asleep."

"And then what did you do?" Tobi asked, excitedly, leaning towards Kisame.

"I picked up the cold pot of tea and poured it over Itachi's head, and he immediately began to cough and splutter. Then he sat up and punched me in the stomach and glared at me."

"You've cleaned up," Sasori, noted.

Itachi nodded. "He always does." His phone rang. "Hang on." He reached it in to his pocket. Barley glancing at callers ID he answered it.

"Talk to me,"

"Hey," said Hatsu.

"Oh, hi, honey."

"What have I said about calling me that?"

"Not to,"

"Start again."

"Do I have to?"

"Yes."

Itachi sighed. "Oh. Hi."

"Better." She laughed.

"Good. What's up?"

"Where are you?"

"What do you mean?"

"Our date?"

"Oh, yeah."

"Where are you?"

"In my… Car. Yeah. My car."

"In your car?"

"Yeah."

"So why is there no noise?"

"Because.. because… I cut the engine!"

"Why?"

"Because I'm a gentleman." He said. "Duh."

Everyone was laughing at him. Even Sasori.

"If you were a gentlemen, you'd be here already."

"I-"

"And you'd be here before me."

"I-"

"And I'd be the one late."

"I-"

"And I'd say 'Sorry for being late' and you'd say 'Your not late, I'M EARLY!'"

"I-"

"You'd better be right around the corner, or I'll kick your pretty Uchiha butt!" She yelled, before hanging up.

Itachi shut his phone and looked around.

Everyone was rolling on the floor laughing, with tears streaming down their faces. They were clutching their stomachs and banging the floor with their fists. Itachi sighed.

"Kisame, can I borrow your car?"

"N-n-no way, dude," He said, wiping a tear away. "Your walking your pretty Uchiha butt right around that corner!"

Itachi sighed. "I'll be running my pretty Uchiha butt right around that corner!"

**XxXThe ParkXxX**

Hatsu smiled as she hung up. She had known he was lying. And she had known that other members of his old high school gang, the Akatsuki, had surrounded him. That whole conversation had been just to embarrass him. She could imagine what they were saying to him now.

A hand touched her shoulder.

She turned around, slamming her fist into the side of the person's head yelling: "YOU PERV!"

Itachi was on the floor, dazed from her punch. He was panting.

"H-h-h-ello," he panted out, before lying down on the walkway.

She laughed. "Hey. I guess Kisame didn't give you his car?"

He shook his head. "I've had to run my pretty Uchiha butt right around that corner!" he gasped out.

She nudged him with her foot. "Get up, people are staring."

He smiled. "Would they stare more if I did this?"

He swept her feet from under her, and she fell, landing on top of him.

"Ow," he said.

Hatsu blushed. "You're a good cushion. And YES, they are staring more,"

"You know this would be a perfect moment, but your knee landed in between my legs." He winced.

She laughed and rolled off of him.

"Great, now we're both lying in the middle of the walkway." She said.

"Err, excuse me?"

They both raised their gazes up to where a women was, pushing a buggy.

"I need to get my buggy past," she stated.

"Oh, right, yeah." Hatsu jumped up, and began dragging Itachi onto the grass.

"Ow. OW. Hatsu, Ow, Ow, OW!"

"Stop being a baby," she hissed. "Stand up!"

He climbed gingerly to his feet, and saw that several people were staring at him oddly. He raised a hand and smiled, calling out a "Hey, I'm okay! Ani't life a peach?"

Hatsu rolled her eyes and pulled him into a clump of bushes. "Gosh, Itachi, your so annoying. You hang around with Tobi too much."

"I do it just for you,"

She nudged him playfully with her hip. "Shut up,"

He smiled and wrapped his arms around her waist and pulled her close. Her arms snaked around his neck. Itachi leant down, his breath trembling. She lent up and…

They were soaked.

They broke apart, spluttering.

"Yeah, yeah, Sasuke, we totally got them. We totally got them. Believe it! Believe it!" shouted a voice from a bush near by.

"You just gave our positions you dope!" hissed a different voice from another bush.

Itachi sighed. "Get out. Both of you."

Naruto jumped out, and Hatsu grabbed him and put him in a headlock. Naruto protested and tried to break away, but she held him steadily.

"I'm not coming out!" squawked the voice of Sasuke.

"Oh, you won't? I'll just have to catch you then," said Itachi, teasingly.

Sasuke took one step away. "Your not allowed to touch me until next month!"

"I'll touch you whenever I want! I'm gonna get you,"

"All right. Come and get me then."

Itachi jumped towards the bush and landed on top of Sasuke's back. Sasuke gave a small scream, and then sighed. "Shit."

"No, swearing little brother," said Itachi trapped both of Sasuke's arms behind his back with one of his, then with his other, he put it around Sasuke's neck and pushed him into the clearing, where Hatsu was holding a protesting Naruto.

"Every. Fucking. Time." Hatsu muttered.

"How come she can swear?" said Sasuke, angrily. Itachi tightened his grip.

"Well, one she's older, and two, I love her."

"Aw, I love you too, Itachi," she beamed.

"This is getting way too mushy!" yelled Naruto from under her arm. "Believe it!"

Hatsu sighed, frustrated. "That's worse then Deidara's 'Un''s!"

"I know, believe it!"

**Death:**** Aw, I love that bit! It's so funny, typical Naruto. *Shakes head* He's so cute!**

**ShinigamiQueen:**** He's so annoying!**

**Death: ****He's cute annoying!**

**ShinigamiQueen****: No he's not.**

**Death:**** Not even a little bit?**

**ShinigamiQueen:**** When he's in four-tailed-kyuubi mode.**

**Death:**** Your no fun.**

**ShinigamiQueen;**** Hatsu is one my OC's, in case you hadn't guessed that yet.**

**Death:**** I think they got it. **

**Both:**** REVIEW OR NARUTO AND SASUKE WILL WATER BALLOON YOU! BELIEVE IT! **


	4. Phone Calls From The Mad One

**Death:**** *sings*****Let's start a riot, a riot! Let's start a riot! Let's start a riot, a riot! Let's start a riot! If you feel so filthy, so dirty, so fucked up. If you feel so walked on. So painful, so pissed off. You're not the only one. Refusing to go down. You're not the only one. So get up.**

**ShinigamiQueen: *****sings*****Let's start a riot, a riot! Let's start a riot! Let's start a riot, a riot! Let's start a riot!**

**4. Phone Calls From The Mad One**

XxXNaruto+SasukeXxX

They crouched in the bushes, trying to be quiet. But in Naruto's case, that was especially hard.

"Sasuke, Sasuke, are we gonna get them? Are we gonna get them? Why we getting them again? Is it because you want a girlfriend? Because I'm sure Sakura be happy to-"

"Shut up, you twat," Sasuke hissed from his bush. "We're gonna hit them just as there about to kiss."

"Hey, Sasuke. I have a fly over here that's wants to be a wasp."

"I don't care if it wants to be a freaking wasp. Your gonna be quiet. And STAY QUIET!"

"Yes, sir."

Sasuke rolled his eyes and turned his attention back to his brother and his _girlfriend. _

_How can someone like him have a girlfriend? _thought Sasuke, bitterly.

He saw Hatsu roll her eyes and pull Itachi into a clump of bushes. "Gosh, Itachi, your so annoying. You hang around with Tobi too much."

"I do it just for you," he said sappily. Sasuke mimed being sick.

She nudged him playfully with her hip. "Shut up,"

Itachi smiled and wrapped his arms around her waist and pulled her close. Hatsu arms snaked around his neck. Sasuke tightened his grip on his water pistol. Itachi leant down, his breath trembling. She lent up and… he fired.

The couple were soaked.

They broke apart, spluttering.

"Yeah, yeah, Sasuke, we totally got them. We totally got them. Believe it! Believe it!" shouted Naruto from his bush.

"You just gave our positions you dope!" Sasuke hissed from his bush.

Itachi sighed. "Get out. Both of you."

Naruto jumped out, and Hatsu grabbed him and put him in a headlock. Naruto protested and tried to break away, but she held him steadily.

"I'm not coming out!" Sasuke squawked.

"Oh, you won't? I'll just have to catch you then," said Itachi, teasingly.

Sasuke took one step away. "Your not allowed to touch me until next month!"

"I'll touch you whenever I want! I'm gonna get you,"

"All right. Come and get me then."

Itachi jumped towards the bush and landed on top of Sasuke's back. Sasuke gave a small scream, and then sighed. "Shit."

"No, swearing little brother," said Itachi trapped both of Sasuke's arms behind his back with one of his, then with his other, he put it around Sasuke's neck and pushed him into the clearing, where Hatsu was holding a protesting Naruto.

"Every. Fucking. Time." Hatsu muttered.

"How come she can swear?" said Sasuke, angrily. Itachi tightened his grip.

"Well, one she's older, and two, I love her."

"Aw, I love you too, Itachi," she beamed.

"This is getting way too mushy!" yelled Naruto from under her arm. "Believe it!"

Hatsu sighed, frustrated. "That's worse then Deidara's 'Un''s!"

"I know, believe it!"

_And that's my partner in crime, _Sasuke thought, miserably.

**XxXTobiXxX**

Tobi jumped around the flat, at loss at what to do. Deidara had been accused of arson, so Sasori was being his lawyer. Although, as Deidara had suggested, he could just blow them up if it went wrongs, but Sasori had squashed the idea quickly, because then he would be accused of murder.

"I'll get them to hold my hands," Deidara had said, winking at Sasori. Needless to say, Sasori had then bundled him into the car, leaving Tobi and Kisame alone.

Kisame had said something about 'homework' and had locked the door to his bedroom, leaving Tobi to his jumping.

"I know what Tobi'll do!" he announced brightly to the empty, trashed up room. Tobi will call up each and every Akatsuki member to invite them to a party!"

He walked over to the phone and dialled a number.

"_Hello?"_ said the voice of Kisame.

"Hey, this is Tobi!"

"_Why are you calling me on the house phone to my mobile, when I'm already in the house?"_ he asked, angrily.

"Well, you locked your door, and Tobi can't get through doors. Tobi's not Zetsu."

"_Can't you just shout through my door?"_

"No, because Sasori-danna said it was rude."

"_Rude to shout through doors?"_

"Yeah,"

"_What is it?"_

"I've come to invite you to a party!"

"_A party where?"_

"Here. Duh."

"_Isn't that rude?"_

"Isn't what rude?"

"_To invite me to a party in my own house?"_

"No,"

"So, it's rude to shout through doors, but not to invite me to a party which is in my own house. HOW IS THAT LOGICAL?"

"Sasori said it was rude to shout through doors, but not to invite people to a parties which are in their own houses."

"You little-"

"Tobiishangingupthephonenow," Tobi gabbled before slamming the phone down.

He could hear Kisame banging against his bedroom door, shouting abuse at him.

"Tobi, I'm gonna get you… Oh, shit, where's my key? Shit, shit, shit, shit!" He began to bang more fiercely on the door, before he remembered that Itachi didn't like his doors being knocked down. He'd just have to find it in his room. He sighed. That was going to take all freaking daaaaaaaaaaaay.

"Tobi calling Pein. Tobi calling Pein. Oh, hey Pein!"

"What is it? You just interrupted something important!"

"And what was that important thing?"

"N-nothing."

"Tobi can hear Konan laughing in the background."

"Konan isn't laughing. (Konan shut up)"

"Okayies, well, Tobi is calling to invite you to a party."

"A party? Whereabouts?"

"At Kisame's and Itachi's place,"

"If it's at their place, why are YOU phoning?"

"Because Itachi's out on a date, Kisame's locked himself in his room by accident, Deidara has been accused of arson, so Sasori was being his lawyer. So that's only leaves Tobi,"

"Itachi's out on a date?"

"Sure he is. He said he was a gentlemen, and she said that she was going to kick his pretty Uchiha butt!"

"Okay… well we'll be there."

"Konan-chan is there."

"No, stupid, we'll be at the party! Goodbye."

"Bye Pein! I hope you enjoy your 'something important'!"

"You little-"

"Tobiishangingupthephonenow."He slammed the phone down again. "Let's call Zetsu. Or Zetsu's"

"_Hello?"_ said the voice of one of the Zetsu's.

"Hey Zetsu's, this is Tobi!"

"What do you mean 'Zetsu's'?"

"Well, you have two faces… like the guy in Harry Potter!"

"In what?"

"Harry Pott- Never mind. Anyway, you two lovebirds want to come to a party at Itachi's place?"

"_Sure!" _yelled white Zetsu as black Zetsu yelled: _"What do you mean LOVEBIRDS? You little-" _

"Tobiishangingupthephonenow." He slammed the phone down for the third time.

"Tobi calling Kakuzu. Tobi calling Kakuzu. Oh, hiya!"

"What d you want?"

"I want to invite you to a party, at Itachi's place!"

"Fine, I'll be there."

"Are you okay? You sound ill."

"You little-"

"Tobiishangingupthephonenow." Tobi then pulled out his mobile and texted:

**PARTY AT ITACHI'S PLACE. BE THERE OR BE SQUARE. PEACE OUT, SUCKERS!**

Then sent it to Sasori and Deidara.

Now for Hidan. Tobi didn't like Hidan. He scared him. He dialled the numbers carefully.

"Hey Hidan," Tobi whispered.

"Why the fuck are you whispering?"

"Tobi doesn't know."

"Is there something fucking wrong with you?"

"No, but Tobi wants to invite you to a party at Itachi's place."

"Okay, I'll be there."

"Good,"

"Will you stop whispering you little piece of shit?"

"It's not nice to call people pieces of shit, Hidan."

"You little-"

"Tobiishangingupthephonenow."

Tobi sat down on the coffee table again.

He felt so happy.

**XxXItachi+HatsuXxX**

"Excuse me, sir, I think this belongs to you," said Hatsu, gesturing to Naruto.

Minato looked down at his son, and stepped out of the way, so he could enter. Naruto moaned and trailed inside, before his father shut the door.

Itachi smiled at Hatsu, who kissed his cheek.

"I'M STILL HERE YOU KNOW?" yelled Sasuke.

"I wished I didn't." She said, turning him. "Duck-butt hair."

Sasuke glared, but was unable to do anything to her, due to the fact he was tied up. **(****Death:**** You read, right, tied up. *laughs*) **

"Now, we have to drop him off to Madara," sighed Itachi.

"Yes, we do," she said, sighing as well. Itachi wrapped an arm around her, she leant into him.

"UGH! GO GET A ROOM!"

**Death:**** *sings* ****If you feel so empty, so used up so let down. If you feel so angry, so ripped off so stepped on. You're not the only one. Refusing to back down. You're not the only one. So get up**

**ShinigamiQueen: *****sings*****Let's start a riot, a riot! Let's start a riot! Let's start a riot, a riot! Let's start a riot!**

**Both:**** REVIEW OR TOBI WILL RING YOU UP IN THE MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT! **


	5. Sake And Vodka

**ShinigamiQueen:**** I love that last line... I find myself shouting that at the TV**

**Death:**** She does. When we were watching New Moon, Edward and Bella were kissing and she suddenly yelled, "GO GET A ROOM!" **

**ShinigamiQueen:**** Of course not in the cinema; I had a giant coughing fit instead then. AND ALMOST DIED!**

**Death:**** Yeah, yeah whatever, Miss. Dramatic. *rolls eyes***

**ShinigamiQueen:**** *hits Death* **

**Death:**** Ow! Meanie. *pouts***

**ShinigamiQueen:**** Believe it!**

**5. Sake And Vodka**

"_Yes, we do," she said, sighing as well. Itachi wrapped an arm around her, she leant into him. _

"_UGH! GO GET A ROOM!" _

**XxXThe PartyXxX**

The doorbell rang. Tobi bounced forward and opened the door.

It was Pein with Konan wrapped around his arm.

"Hello Pein-sama and Konan-chan."

"Tobi." Pein nodded at Tobi.

Konan smiled coldly at Tobi, as they passed him and walked into the room. They looked around, speculating.

"Oh. My. God. What have you done?" asked Pein in horror.

"Tobi did some decorations!" he announced brightly, as the doorbell rang again.

Zetsu melted through the door, before Tobi could open it. He smiled, well, half of him did.

"Hello Tobi."

"Hiya lovebirds!"

_Ding-dong. _

"Tobi is answering the door to _see...Kakuzu!"_

_Kakuzu smiled and waved at the others, who all either ignored him or grinned back._

"_Where's Itachi?" Kakuzu asked, looking around._

"_Itachi is out on a date. Tobi and_ _Kisame here for now!" _

"Okay,_" Kakuzu ran a hand through his hair and stepped inside. _

_Deidara and Sasori burst in then. _

"_I'M ON TRAIL BECAUSE OF YOU TOBI! WAIT UNTIL I GET MY HANDS AROUND YOUR NECK YOU LITTLE-" He stopped mid sentence, staring around at all the onlookers. _

"_Yes Senpai?" Tobi said, cutely._

"_Too many witlessness." Deidara grumbled. "I'll get you later, though." _

"_What happened?" chorused around the room. _

_Sasori sighed, and began to tell everyone. _

"Tobi kept going on about birds tweeting and blue skies, so I pointed out that it was a grey day and there were no birds, so he said that pigeons were birds. I mean, are pigeons birds? Don't answer that. Anyway, we began to argue and Deidara began to freak out that he looked like a girl in the poster. Which exploded, by the way. Anyhow, so then Tobi said that he always looked like a girl, and Deidara began to scream about how he was going to cut off Tobi's head and throw it to the pigeons and Tobi said they were birds, and I pointed out they were rats with wings. So, Deidara was screaming about how Tobi was going to die, Tobi was insisting that they were birds and I was pointing out that they weren't. Deidara said that he didn't care what they were; they were going to eat Tobi's head for lunch. Then Tobi said that it wasn't lunch until much later, so I told him to shut up, and Deidara ran forward screaming. Tobi began to run toward Deidara screaming about how Deidara wasn't going to kill him, and Deidara accidentally blew up the museum in proving that he was going to kill Tobi. That's it."

_There was a silence and then Kakuzu interrupted._

"_Wow. Will it cost me anything?" _

"_Nope. Just Tobi's life." Deidara said, grimly._

"_Something I'm happy to take," said Hidan, walking in. He smiled at Deidara and winked nastily at Tobi, who shrank back. _

"_Hidan!" _

_Hidan smiled, and lounged on one of the sofas. "Hey, you bitches. Want a fucking drink?"_

"_Sure," said a few people, coming forward._

_Hidan looked around slowly, and then back at Tobi, who was unsuccessfully trying to hide himself behind a curtain. _

"_Nice decorating, bitch." He said good-humorously, pouring himself a drink and setting the bottles of vodka and sake on the floor. "One of each for you pieces of fucking shit."_

They each picked up a bottle each of either and began to drink them.

**XxXOne Hour LaterXxX **

Itachi turned the key in the lock and opened the door.

His jaw dropped.

The whole flat was covered in some kind of pink. Pink cloth covered the floor and sofas. Pink cakes were covering the pink table. Pink bunnies were stapled by the ears to the pink wallpaper. And in the middle of it all was Tobi, Pein, Konan, Zetsu, Kakuzu, Deidara, Sasori, Kisame and Hidan dancing and singing.

Itachi walked inside, shut the door and leant against it, to gain some sort of strength. He took a deep breath.

"WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON? AND WHAT IS UP WITH THE PINK? I HATE PINK!"

They all paused, and then Hidan came over and wrapped an arm around him.

"Word worthy of me," He said, pressing a bottle of Sake into Itachi's hand. "Drink."

Itachi sighed, and took a sip.

**XxXOne Hour LaterXxX **

Tobi was swinging on the lampshade, belting out "Banana Phone!"

Deidara was walking around, pressing his hands to everything that came within his reach, saying "Make out. Making out."

Kisame was singing the Jaws theme song. "Do. Duh. Do. Duh. Do. Duh."

Zetsu was singing karaoke with himself. "I'm a B, I'm a B." Sang the white side, whilst the other was warbling; "We'll meet again, don't know where, don't know when..."

Itachi was staggering around pointing at the pink bunnies, which were stabled by the ears to the pink wallpaper, saying a different things to each one, such as: "You lack blackness," he said to one, and then to his neighbour; "You lack greenness,"

Pein was singing; Hidan while was shouting, "JASHIN LOVES YOU EVERYBODY" and making 'peace' signs with both hands and then started to jump up and down on the sofa, knocking pink coloured frilly cushions onto the floor.

Kakuzu was just lying under the coffee table, now draped with a pink blanket due to Tobi of course, with various Sake and Vodka bottles in his tentacles coming out of his arms. Itachi poked him with a stick to see if he was alive and then threw it away when he gathered that Kakuzu was unconscious.

Konan was making various…let's just say, _things_ out of origami, including some bunnies and a few obscene items. She then stuck a piece of paper on Hidan's back saying 'I have a big mouth, but not _big _where it counts'

Sasori, who had 'Deidei was here' written in Konan's lipstick on his forehead was asking Itachi _questions_ about his date such as "hey weasel, see anything _good? _You do _anything interesting?" _only to be answered by "You lack pink bunnies" as Tobi drew a moustache on the weasel Uchiha's face, accompanied by facial hair in a pink coloured marker.

Pein had found a microphone in all the rubble piled up next to the wall near the door and started singing "Pain, without love. Pain, I can't get enough. Pain, I like it rough. 'Cause I'd rather feel pain than nothing at all". It wasn't that bad, just interrupted by constant hiccupping and the fact that Pain also had pink bows in his hair and had his facial piercing's joined together by different colour markers like a game of connect the dots made everybody look at him and laugh, even the singing Zetsu's.

This was going to be a long night.

**ShinigamiQueen:**** Sorry about how long it took, my computers ancient. **

**SQ: I'm sorry for the long wait and the shortness of the chapter and that I had to take it down and put up a revised copy, chapter six and all following chapters will hopefully make it up to you guys who bothered to read this far**

**Both:**** REVIEW OR THE DRUNK AKATSUKI WILL COME TO YOUR HOUSE!**

**Death:**** Peace out, suckers! *Peace sign***


	6. The Aftermath With A Prank Call

**Death: ****We got the idea for this chapter when we were walking home in the pouring rain, listening to I Hate Everything About You and we went past a very muddy field.**

**ShinigamiQueen:**** We instantly thought of Sasuke. **

**Death:**** (Kakashi's voice) **_**You are better than the rest of them. My Souse-gay. **_

**ShinigamiQueen:**** Now on with the chapter! XD**

XxXSasukeXxX

Sasuke stared up at his ceiling, tracing the cracks with his eyes. He could hear Madara snoring in the next room. He sighed and glanced at his alarm clock for what seemed the millionth time this night.

_11:56_

He sighed and sat up.

It was clear he wasn't going to get any sleep.

Silently, he pulled on some clothes and crept downstairs. The floorboards creaked under his weight, so he had to pause every now and again to make sure Madara was still asleep.

He jumped off the last six stairs and landed perfectly, silently. Then he picked up his keys from the hall table and shoved them in his pocket, before he crammed his feet into his trainers that were several times too small.

He went out of the house and started down the road.

It would be ages before anyone noticed he was gone.

It was raining and he hadn't thought to put a jacket on. He hugged himself in effort to get warm and tried to cover his hair to no success. It had turned wavy.

He hated it.

He opened the gate to the park and made his way down the path. It silent and the only lights he could see were the ones coming from the city. He tripped over something and landed on the sweet-smelling grass.

He crawled forward slightly, and banged hid head against a tree. Dazed and tired, he wrapped his arms around his head, curled up and shut his eyes tightly.

_He was running and he saw a lonely figure. With a jolt, he recognized himself. _

_A small eight-year-old staring in shock, tears falling gently down his face. He flinched away from the memory. _

Then he saw Itachi cross over to him and wrap an arm around him. He knew that the anger was going to come. He saw his younger form's face show hurt, then betrayal. Little Sasuke pushed Itachi away and walked a few paces. Sasuke could remember the words that Madara had told him only a few hours before he had arrived.

"_It was your older brothers fault."_

The words echoed though Sasuke's mind, as he sat up and hit his head against a branch. Wincing, he sat up more carefully and looked around.

The sky was a dull grey, the beginning of sunrise. He stretched, and then lay back down.

He finally had some quiet.

"Sasuke! I DIDN'T KNOW YOU CAME HERE TOO!"

"Oh-no," he moaned.

Naruto bounded over, smiling and shouting. Sasuke stood up and leant against the tree, trying to look like he hadn't spent the night sleeping on the wet grass. Naruto came over grinning.

"What'cha doing'? You look like a drowned-rat."

"I'm, um, practicing."

"THAT'S SO COOL! I CAME TO DO EXACTLY THAT! BELIEVE IT!"

"Naruto, will you be a little quieter?"

Naruto muttered something.

Sasuke leaned forward. "What I didn't hear that?"

"SURE I WILL! BELIEVE IT!"

"Argh," moaned Sasuke.

Naruto laid down where Sasuke had been lying. "Do you remember when we had our first chakra training with Kakashi-Sensei? And Sakura got there before us, so we spent ALL night doing it and next morning I pretended to fall off the tree then showed Kakashi-Sensei and Sakura that I could actually do it and THEN I nearly fell for real and you saved me?"

"Vaguely," Sasuke said, sitting next to him.

Naruto turned to beam at him. "WELL, THIS IS EVEN COOLER THAN THAT! C'MON! I'LL RACE YOU!"

"I just want to be alone," Sasuke said.

"Oh, okay."

Silence.

"Hey, Sasuke?" Naruto said.

Sasuke breathed sharply, before turning his head slightly. "Yes?"

"Do you want to go for some Ramen after this?"

"No."

"Okay."

Silence.

"I'll will."

"Hmm."

"So..."

"So what, Naruto?"

"Can I tell you a secret?"

"What?"

Naruto pulled Sasuke down so he could whisper in his ear. "I like Itachi's girlfriend."

"WHAT'S WRONG WITH YOU? WHY CAN'T YOU BE QUIET?"" Sasuke yelled, pulling away.

"I can be quiet." Naruto pouted.

"Well, prove it." Sasuke turned away.

Silence.

"Believe it,"

"AAAAAHHHHHHHH!"

XxXAkatsuki; The AftermathXxX

Itachi woke up, upside down. His apartment, to his surprised horror…was _PINK…. and had lipstick marks over the coffee table and counters in the kitchen. Itachi then shook his head and tumbled of the sofa while muttering, "_what the hell happened last night?"

Kisame walked in, slowly took in all the mess and Itachi's crumpled form at the foot of the sofa.

"I'm not cleaning this up, it's all yours," Kisame said as he stepped over the mess of stuffed bunnies and went out the door.

Itachi then pulled himself up and stumbled into the bathroom and fell through the door. He then caught himself on the sink and looked up at himself in the mirror. He stared at his reflection for five seconds before it finally seeped in, drawn on his face in permanent marker was a moustache with matching beard like one you may draw to deface a painting.

"…AAAAAHHHHHHHH!" he screamed as he ran out the room, tripped over his own feet and landed with a thud on the wooden floor.

"Do you mind Itachi-san **where trying to sleep" **said the white and black halves of Zetsu who where inside a large flower pot with their head sticking out. "Uh-oh…" said the white half as he took in the mess "**Your on your own Uchiha" **black Zetsu said as he melted through the wall and disappeared.

Itachi then climbed up using the pot, _when did I ever have a flowerpot? _He thought to himself.

He then tottered into his bedroom and made his way to his wardrobe. _At least my rooms okay _he thought as he opened the doors.

Inside, crumpled at the bottom was Hidan, wearing pink bunny ears and matching fairy wings. "Pass me the trousers hanging up there" said Itachi casually, "sure" said Hidan who passed him a pair of jeans. "Thanks" said Itachi who then closed the door and walked three paces away from the closet. Itachi then ran back and banged the doors open.

"WHY ARE YOU IN MY CLOSET!"

"HOW THE FUCK SHOULD I KNOW!" Screamed Hidan

"GET OUT"

"OKAY, NO SHIT SHERLOCK, I'm GETTING OUT" Shouted Hidan as he tumbled out of the open doors.

Hidan swaggered to his feet and looked at Itachi's blank and face

"Nice moustache" he snickered

"Nice fairy wings" answered Itachi.

Hidan then instantly felt his back and tugged on the wings, then felt his head. He was right, there was a matching pair of bunny ears.

"GET THIS FUCKING SHIT OF ME"

"No, get out of my apartment before I use my Sharingan on you"

"Oh-no, 72 hours of torture in 3 minuets, I'm so sacred" Said Hidan sarcastically as he walked out the room and out the front door after dumping the wings and ears on the floor.

Itachi then walked into the living room and looked around, "I know I'm not going to be able to clean this up by myself" he said to himself as he reached into his pocket and pulled out his mobile phone, thankfully it was still there. He typed in a number and looked at the clock, _9:30am_

Please be up

"_Hn_" answered the voice on the other side

"Wake up sleepy head, rise and shine"

"_No phone calls until at least 10 o'clock" Said the sleepy voice of Hatsu._

"I need help to clean up"

"Get Kisame to do it, anyway didn't Sasuke come two days ago"

"He did, Kisame's out and when I got home I found Tobi started a party without me"

"…_Tobi…" She sighed, "I'll be round soon, not one person can clean up after him, even with that pretty Uchiha butt of yours" _

And with that Hatsu hung up the phone and Itachi sat down and turned on the TV.

XxX Half Hour Later XxX

"You took your time"

"Bed head, morning, inability to form a sentence" Hatsu mumbled as she walked into the middle of the room and looked around

"Your verdict" asked Itachi as he stumbled over after her.

"Like Barney and Elmo threw up all over your living room", She then turned to look at his face, her look was priceless.

"Can you please stop staring at the beard and moustache, I can't get it off"

"The beard doesn't suit you, anyway, that's not what I'm looking at," she said while pointing to her forehead, "seems someone's kissed you instead of me".

Itachi gave her a confused look, picked up a spoon and saw in his reflection a big lipstick mark on his forehead…._ great…_

Five minuets later the house phone rang, Itachi knocked over a few bunnies of the side table into a bin bag and picked up the phone.

"Who's speaking?"

"_Hello, is your refrigerator running"_

"I asked who's speaking"

"_Uzumaki Naruto, Number One Hyperactive Knuckleheaded Ninja, Believe it" _Itachi could hear someone facepalm on the other side of the phone.

"How did you get my number?"

"_It…was…. on a…tree"_

"Really?"

"…" Naruto hung up.

"…Well, at least it wasn't another Seymour Butts joke" Itachi muttered out load

"So, you have a pretty butt" Hatsu teased as she put an empty Sake bottle in the bin bag.

XxX Sasuke and Naruto XxX

Sasuke face-palmed, he and Naruto where sitting on a bench in the park.

"That's not how you do a prank phone call"

"Why?"

"Because it's not"

"Whyy?

"Because you gave away your identity"

"whyyy?"

"Well…I don't know, do I?"

"Whyyyyy?

"Because-"

"Whyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy?"

"Will you shut up?"

"Whyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy?"

Silence

"BELIEVE IT!"

Sasuke face-palmed, '_why do I even hangout with this guy', _he thought to himself.

Shinigami Queen: I was forced to write everything after the aftermath by myself, with ideas from a random conversation with my friend in PE…stupid running a lap around the field in the rain in shorts that might as well be hot-pants and being forced to play bench ball first thing in the morning…anyway, if you're wondering where Death is; she's hiding because she forgot her PE kit.

Still ShinigamiQueen: Review or Tobi will throw a party at your house, would be something Death would write if she were here.

But, I say, Review and you get a cookie.


	7. Now Or Never

**Death:**** Chapter Seven! I'm getting really distracted by a love letter and a lemon I wrote earlier. Very mild. She wouldn't let me write anything stronger… *pouts***

**ShinigamiQueen:**** It's strong enough! I'm sorry if the story's not lemon. *sarcasm***

**Death: ****Oh, thanks *matches tone***

**ShinigamiQueen:**** *sigh***

**Death:**** Trust me guys, there's barely anything in it. You'll read it later on… anyway, like I said, really distracted. *headdesk* Anyway, Chapter Seven! **

**ShinigamiQueen:**** *shouts in distance* Anyway, on with the dramatic climax!**

**7. Now Or Never**

XxXItachi+HatsuXxX

"So, you have a pretty butt" Hatsu teased as she put an empty Sake bottle in the bin bag.

Itachi rolled his eyes, picked up a pillow and threw it at her. Hatsu caught it just before it hit her face and flicked it straight back. Itachi leaned backwards and the pillow flew over him.

**(****Both:**** cough-matrix-cough)**

Hatsu sighed. "Why do you have to be so good?"

"I do it just for you," Itachi teased her, reaching over to muss her hair.

Hatsu grabbed his wrist and twisted his arm up his back. Itachi didn't even wince.

"Like _that's_ gonna hurt," he scoffed.

"How 'bout this," Hatsu said, sweetly, pulling his arm further up.

"OW. OW. OW! OKAY, THAT HURTS! IT HURTS! STOOOOOOP!"

"That's for waking me up early and making me clean up after you and your friends!"

"OKAY, I'M SORRY! I'M, SORRY!"

"Uh-uh." She shook her head. "You'll have to do better than that."

"HATSU, I LOVE YOU AND I'M REALLY SORRY! I'LL NEVER ASK YOU TO DO THIS AGAIN AFTER TODAY! I'LL TAKE YOU OUT FOR DINNER AND WE CAN GO AND STARE AT A DUMB BOAT FOR HOURS IF IT'S WHAT YOU WANT! I'LL NEVER GO DRINKING AGAIN I PROMISE! I'LL STOP SINGING BRITNEY SPEARS SONGS IN THE SHOWER! I'LL EVEN STOP HANGING OUT WITH TOBI! JUST PLEASE LET GO OF MY ARM!" His voice had risen to a painful screech by the end.

"Okay," she said, letting go of his arm.

Itachi nursed his arm. "I pour my heart out, say I'll stop doing my favourite things, and you just say, 'Okay'?"

"Your favourite things include singing Britney Spears songs in the shower?"

"I,-"

"And drinking?"

"I-"

"And hanging out with Tobi?"

"I, erm, like hanging out with you more?"

Her blue eyes narrowed and her purple hair seemed to stand on end. "You'd better."

"Well, I do!"

"Good," she smiled, sweetly. "So, what's your favourite Britney Spears song?"

Itachi went red. "Hit me baby one more time,"

Hatsu slapped him around the face. Itachi staggered backwards.

"What was that for?" he screeched.

She shrugged. "You told me to hit you one more time. Except I don't like the name baby,"

"Sorry, babe."

"Don't call me that,"

"Sorry, babe."

"I said: Don't call me that,"

"Sorry, babe."

"DON'T BLOODY WELL CALL ME THAT!"

"I'm really sorry…. Babe."

"I'M GONNA GET YOU!"

Hatsu jumped onto Itachi's back and began to ruffle his hair. He began to try to flip her off, when Kisame's door opened and he came into the room, to see Itachi trying to wrestle Hatsu on to the sofa. He paused.

"Sorry, if I was, er, _interrupting_," He smirked, and went to the fridge.

"Not at all," Hatsu said. "You can come and join us if you want," she winked.

"Er.." Kisame clocked Itachi's If-you-come-near-my-girlfriend-I-will-rip-off-your-head-and-give-it-to-Tobi-death-stare. "I'm okay here thanks, I just came out for a can of coke,"

"Aw, come on," Hatsu slid out of Itachi's hold, went over to Kisame and wrapped her arms around his waist, laying her head on his chest, sighing.

"Err.." Kisame had no idea what to do. If he wrapped his arms around her, Itachi would rip his head off. If he pulled her off, Itachi would pull off his head. Anything he did to Hatsu, Itachi would murder him for. Okay, Itachi was smaller than him and not as strong, physically, but he was _scary!_

He looked over at Itachi, whose face was a mask of shock. Kisame began to laugh. Hatsu turned and saw Itachi's face. She grinned.

"C'mere you," Hatsu said, pulling Itachi into the group hug.

XxXSasuke+MadaraXxX

"Do I look like I give a damn about your stupid house rules?" Sasuke screamed at his uncle.

"Well, you should," Madara said, quietly.

"Well, I bloody well, don't!"

"Sasuke, I let you have freedom, but you have to come home when it grows dark and your not allowed to call Itachi without my permission and when I'm around,"

"And why not? He's my Jashin-damn fucking brother!"

"Because he could try to tell you his version of the story, which is all lies,"

"Oh, yeah, sure, I'd _love_ to hear his side," Sasuke said, sarcastically.

"He could say it while you were talking about something else, so you'd _have_ to hear it,"

"Well, what is his side of the story anyway? You never told me,"

"This conversation is at an end," Madara said, briskly. "Go to your room and stay in it."

Sasuke went into his room, slamming the bedroom door as loudly as he could mange.

Sasuke sat in the middle of his room and pulled out Madara's mobile phone, which he had pocketed from the table.

He hesitated before pressing the call button to a person he hated.

XxXMadaraXxX

He waited until Sasuke had slammed into his room, before picking up the house phone.

He dialled a number he hadn't dialled for years, but had remembered for all of them.

"Hello?"

"_Madara,"_ said the silky voice at the other end.

"Yes,"

"_Well, well, well. Come crawling back at last. You in trouble?"_

"No, but Sasuke's getting curious about the past."

The voice on the other end snorted. _"He wouldn't see the truth if it danced in front of him wearing a tea cosy. What's wrong?"_

"It makes me uneasy,"

"You always were a coward when it came to concealing the truth,"

Madara tensed. "Hmm."

The voice chuckled. _"Relax. If you want, I can come pay you and him a little visit."_

"You can,"

"_I'll come soon,"_ the voice said, before hanging up.

"And respect your elders," Madara muttered into the empty phone.

XxXItachi+Hatsu+KisameXxX

Kisame didn't know what to do.

If he wrapped his arms around Hatsu, Itachi would rip his head his head off, if he pushed her off, Itachi would _still_ rip his head off.

He just couldn't win.

Hatsu let go of Kisame and faced Itachi, smirking slightly. Itachi pulled her close and put his hands in the back pockets of her jeans. Hatsu's gaze travelled from his eyes to his mouth and back up again.

A cough interrupted the moment; half-amused half-annoyed.

"What?" Itachi snapped, turning to glare at Kisame.

"I'm stayin' _riiight_ here," Kisame said, sprawling himself across the sofa.

"That's okay, we were just leaving," Hatsu said, grabbing Itachi's hand and dragging him out of the flat.

"Where are we going?" Itachi asked, as they walked hand in hand down the stairs.

"Isn't it obvious?"

Itachi shook his head, bemused.

"We're going to stare at a dumb boat."

XxXSasukeXxX

Sasuke hung up the phone and replaced it in his pocket. He stood, stretched and decided to go and talk to Madara; to demand what his problem was.

He put his hand on the doorknob when there was a crash from behind him.

He spun around, ready for a fight.

"Jeez! I climbed up the drainpipe and clambered through your window! I've come to play! Believe it!"

**XxXItachi+HatsuXxX**

"So, then I woke, Kisame left, and I found Hidan in my wardrobe wearing fairy wings, Zetsu was in a plant pot – he then disappeared like he normally does and I called you." Itachi finished and took a sip of tea.

"That still doesn't explain how the beard and moustache got on your face."

"Blame Tobi," he said, bluntly.

"It makes you look like Johnny Depp."

"Is that a compliment?"

"No, a fact," Hatsu said, smiling sweetly.

"You want to go stare at a dumb boat after this meal?" Itachi asked, smirking.

"No, that was your idea." Hatsu replied, straight faced, as she picked up her chopsticks.

He picked up his own, picked some sushi up and held it out to her.

Hatsu raised an eyebrow.

"You are _so_ not feeding me Mr. Depp."

"Fair 'enough," Itachi brought his chopsticks over to his own mouth.

"HI ITACHI!"

Looking up, Itachi spat out his food straight into Hatsu's face.

"I SAID YOU WEREN'T FEEDING ME!" she screamed, stabbing him with her chopsticks.

"Sorry," he said, quickly.

A girl with dyed platinum blonde hair, wearing a tight low cut shirt and a short skirt, which showed her legs with high heels.

"Hey Itachi! I never, like, knew, like, that you'd, like, be, like, here, like, now!"

Itachi put his face in his hands.

Hatsu's eyes flashed, as she said: "Who the _hell_ are you? A wannabe Barbie?"

"No," the girl smirked. "I'm, like, En'u. Duh."

"Well, I'm, like, Hatsu. Duh."

"I was, like, his girlfriend!"

"I AM, like, his girlfriend!"

"NO WAY!" Both girls said, turning on the rapidly shrinking Itachi.

"YOU'RE GOING OUT WITH HER?" En'u yelled at the same time Hatsu screamed "YOU WENT OUT WITH HER?"

Itachi's red face peered over the table, and nodded.

Both girls faced each other glaring.

Now you could only see Itachi's crimson forehead above the table.

"Your, like, hair, like, sucks!"

"You suck all over Barbie!"

"Want, like, me to, like, slap, like, your face?"

""Do you want me to punch you?"

Itachi, unnoticed by the screaming girls, sat back up slowly.

"I'M GONNA, LIKE, KICK, LIKE, YOUR, LIKE, STOMACH!" En'u screeched, poising herself.

"HOW 'BOUT I SHOVE MY CHOPSTICKS UP WHERE THE SUN DON'T SHINE?" Hatsu snarled, taking out her skull and crossbone earrings and picking up her chopsticks.

"When a girl takes out her earrings, it's a _really_ bad sign, dude," A guy from a neighbouring table to Itachi.

His table was just one of the many staring at them.

Actually the whole restaurant was staring at them and the waitress seemed to have forgotten she was holding a drink and was gradually spilling it in to the customers lap.

Itachi jumped in front of Hatsu.

"Yes, En'u, I am on a date with Hatsu, and I love her. Good bye."

En'u pouted and strutted off with a flounce of her skirt.

Hatsu looked around at the gob-smacked restaurant.

"What you looking at?" She asked, fiercely.

Everybody in the place seemed to have some kind of job to do which involved leaving.

Hatsu sat back down and put her earrings back in.

Itachi timidly held out his chopsticks to her.

Hesitating, she leaned over and ate the sushi off of his chopsticks.

Glancing over she could see En'u trying to sidle back.

Hatsu waited until En'u was within a meter of the table. She grabbed the jug of coke and threw it at En'u, who let out a scream, gave Hatsu an evil eye and flounced off out of the restaurant, sobbing something awful.

Hatsu turned back to Itachi, who was laughing.

"What?" she snapped.

"One, that was fantastic and two, I finally fed you!"

"Hmm. I got rid of Miss. Foggy."

"Hatsu, that's not very nice." Itachi tried to reason. Hatsu gave him the _look._

"It really suits her though." He added hastily.

"Hmm."

"That sounds serious."

"Mmm."

"Mmm."

"Mmm."

"Well, say something!"

"Itachi, you brought me to a place with the word _shack_ in it, I almost get beaten up by a Barbie doll, and I've made a whole load of enemies."

"Yeah, I did." He said, sheepishly.

"I love it!" She said brightly. "You pay the check and let's go!"

XxXSasukeXxX

"Naruto! What are you doing here?" Sasuke screamed at him.

"I came to play! Believe it!"

Sasuke picked up his alarm clock and threw it at Naruto; it hit him on the head.

Naruto rubbed his head. "Ow,"

"Go. Away. Now."

The door opened and Madara, with a cold smile plastered on his face, stepped over the threshold.

There was a slightly stunned silence.

"Hello Sasuke's evil Uncle!"

Sasuke face-palmed.

"Sasuke, I want you to meet somebody," Madara's smile became even colder. "You, er, may remember him."

Naruto shivered and the two boys followed Madara into the living room where a man in a suit was lounging on the sofa, with an arrogant smirk on his face.

"Hi other evil guy!"

Sasuke banged his head against the wall.

"You can get the one with the stupid look on his face," Madara said.

"Who's the one with the stupid look on his face?" Naruto asked the room brightly. "What is it?"

The man and Madara shared a look. The man stood up and came over to the two boys, gave them a once over, then said:

"We have a mission for you,"

**XxXItachi+HatsuXxX**

"So, are going to go home?" Hatsu asked, swinging their hands.

"I don't know." Itachi said, uncertainly.

"You're no fun," Hatsu said, suddenly.

"I am fun!" he protested.

Suddenly, his hand was gone from her's and she couldn't see him.

"Oh, yeah, funny. Really _witty,_" she called into the night.

No response.

"Itachi, this is so not funny!"

A small chuckle came from behind her.

But when she turned around.

There was no one there.

**Death:**** Eleven pages! *high five***

**SQ:**** I'm SQ now. Long chapter to make up for the looong wait for chapter five, which was the shortest chapter we've written. **

**Death: ****We're never writing at school again. I just though I'd add that if you want to ask questions or anything, please PM SQ and we'd love it if you guys could check out our o/s 'Itachi's Birthday' it contains everyone from the Akatsuki, Hatsu and Sakura, as well. **

**Both:**** REVIEW OR NARUTO WILL CLIMB UP YOUR DRAIN PIPE AND COME TO PLAY AT YOUR HOUSE!**


	8. Over and Over

**SQ:**** The mission, Itachi's disappearance and why Sasuke hates Itachi so much… it all comes clear in this chapter. **

**Death:**** Dun dun DUN! This is not the last chapter btw! And it's my birthday tomorrow! XD**

8. Over And OverXxXHatsuXxX

"AAAAAARRRRRRGGGGGGHHHHHH!"

Hatsu felt a weight leap on top of her and pin her to the ground.

Looking up, she saw Itachi's grinning face.

"WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT FOR YOU TWAT?" she screamed up at him.

"I was just showing you how fun I am." He said, innocently.

"WELL, IT WASN'T!"

"Hatsu," he whispered.

That's when she realised that he was right on top of her.

"Get off me,"

"No,"

"Get. Off."

"What if I don't want to?" he taunted.

"What if I just have to bend my knee ever so slightly..." she sighed.

"Okay," he stood up quickly.

She gave him the _look._

"What?" he asked, confused.

"Chivalry isn't DEAD you know,"

He held out her hand to her, she took his hand and got to her feet.

"I was just about to when you asked," he said, defensively.

Hatsu rolled her eyes. "_Suuure_,"

She held his hand and looked into his eyes. He smiled and stroked her cheek.

"Let's go back to my place and watch a movie," said Itachi.

"Okay," She said as they began to walk along slowly. "What movies you got anyway?"

"Well, Kisame has _Jaws_," he said, avoiding her eyes.

"What else is there? YOU have got to have at least one movie."

"Let's put it this way.. It's either _Jaws_ or… or, erm…"

"Or _what?"_

He looked up at the sky.

"_Jaws_ or… _Finding Nemo."_

"Fish. Kisame. Go figure." Hatsu muttered, dragging him down the road.

XxXTwo Hours LaterXxX

"I'd forgotten how much I liked _Finding Nemo,"_ Hatsu said, leaning back.

"Hmm."

"Where you even watching that movie?"

"No, I was mainly watching you,"

"Psh." Hatsu scoffed.

Itachi put one hand behind her neck and began to draw her face closer to his. She smiled as they drew closer.

_Ding-dong._

"The universe just won't let us kiss, will it?" she said, standing up.

"Everybody loves a forbidden love," Itachi joked, taking her hand and leading her towards the door, and opening it.

Naruto and Sasuke, with a gun, stood in the doorway.

"We've come to assassinate her," said Sasuke in a monotone.

"Believe it!"

"Naruto, what have I said about saying that?" Saskue hissed.

Naruto hung his head as he pouted. "Not to,"

Hatsu rolled her eyes. "Keep dreaming, buddy,"

Itachi activated his Sharingan as soon as Sasuke pulled the trigger. He let go of Hatsu's hand and pushed her away from the door, so hard she fell on to the glass coffee table and it smashed beneath the force of her fall. The bullet continued travelling and hit the opposite wall.

"Next time I won't miss," Sasuke said, his voice full of malice.

Itachi's eyes darkened, his body automatically shifted into a protective crouch and a growl built in his throat. "Sorry, Sasuke, there won't _be_ a next time,"

Naruto and Sasuke advanced and Itachi, still trying to protect Hatsu, walked calmly backwards in to the sitting room, pulled her up and spun her against the wall. He made a protective stance in front of her, his back to her. She peeked from under his arm.

"Foolish little brother,"

"I told you, by name only." Sasuke said, holding up the gun again.

"No, not only by name, Sasuke. Look," Itachi held out his wrist. "We share the same blood line."

"Shut up," Sasuke said, but the gun began to shake in his hands and it lowered an inch.

"Sasuke," Itachi said, calmly, straightening up. "Put the gun down."

"NO!" Sasuke screamed. Itachi felt something hit him in the chest and he fell, unconscious before he even hit the floor.

XxXTen Minutes LaterXxX

Itachi found himself tied to his dining table's leg, his arms behind his back. Looking to his left, he saw Hatsu's worried eyes looking at him, but when their eyes met, she smiled.

Itachi began to assess the situation. He couldn't move his arms, but he could move his legs. The left side of his face was throbbing and he could taste blood.

He looked back at Hatsu, whose eyes were full of tears. "I'm so sorry, Itachi. I love-"

She was cut off by Sasuke who had marched over. He flicked the pistol in his hand and drove the base into her nose. There was a sickening crunch.

"Argh!" she screamed.

"SHUT THE FUCK UP BITCH!" Sasuke shouted.

The youngest Uchiha turned to face his older brother, his eyes full of loathing.

"Now, you get to feel the pain I have felt for the last eight years. The pain of losing someone you love." Sasuke turned back to Hatsu and pressed the gun to her temple.

Then he looked at Itachi.

"Now, tell her it'll be okay," he said.

Itachi looked from one face to the other, and shook his head.

Sasuke grip on the gun tightened. "Tell. Her."

Itachi looked at Hatsu, a lump in his throat. "Hatsuko…it's all going to be okay."

"Good," Sasuke sneered and started to pull the trigger.

"NO! DON'T DO IT!"

A figure came flying and shoved Sasuke to the floor, knocking the gun out of his hands.

"PLEASE DON'T DO IT! BELIEVE IT!" screamed Naruto as he fought to keep Sasuke from reaching the gun.

"WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT FOR?" Sasuke bellowed, trying to strangle his partner in crime.

"THIS MISSION IS STUPID!"

"IT'S NOT ABOUT THE MISSION!"

"THEN WHAT'S IT ABOUT!" Naruto screamed, punching Sasuke in the face.

"IT'S ABOUT HIM ALWAYS UPSTAGING ME!" Sasuke screamed, kicking Naruto in the stomach. "IT'S ABOUT HOW HE MURDERED OUR PARENTS!"

"HE DIDN'T MURDER YOUR PARENTS!" Hatsu screamed, her voice slightly muffled by the blood that was gushing out of her broken nose.

Sasuke turned to face her, his face red. "HOW THE HELL WOULD YOU KNOW?"

"CAN'T WE JUST LOCK HER IN A CUPBOARD AND SAY WE KILLED HER?" Naruto begged.

"NO!" Sasuke screamed, trying to grab the gun. Naruto picked up the gun and threw it out the window, then turned and rugby tackled Sasuke to the floor, where he strangled him.

"Please?" Naruto begged, his voice quieter.

Sasuke shook his head, his movements jerky.

Itachi wriggled trying to escape the rope that tied him.

"You won't be able to escape that. That's proper ninja rope with a proper ninja knot," Naruto said, a note of pride in his voice.

Itachi raised an eyebrow and stood up, the rope slid smoothly to the floor.

"Proper ninja rope with a proper ninja knot," Itachi echoed.

"WHY DIDN'T YOU DO THAT WHEN HE WAS HOLDING A FUCKING GUN TO MY HEAD?" Hatsu screamed.

Sasuke broke out of Naruto's weakened hold and dived at his brother.

They tumbled to the floor and Sasuke pressed his fingers to Itachi's neck, his fingers overlapping.

"Sasuke, do you really see me dead at your feet?" Itachi asked calmly, not even sounding choked.

"IT WILL BE MY REALITY, YOU BASTARD. YOU NEED TO DIE," Sasuke shouted, pushing harder.

Itachi calmly prised Sasuke's arms away from him and held his brother in a headlock.

"Naruto-kun could you please assist Hatsu as it seems she has been tied up with some thing other than your ninja rope. Also, help her with her bleeding nose. I need to sort something out with my brother."

"GET OFF ME YOU BASTARD," shouted Sasuke.

"No," Itachi said, tying Sasuke up with the rope that had held him a few moments before. Once firmly tied, Itachi put Sasuke on the sofa and knelt in front of him.

"Sasuke. Is that what you really believe? That I killed our parents? Is that what Madara told you?"

Sasuke wished he would shout. It would make the whole thing easier if he had shouted the words. Instead his brother was kneeing in front of him, speaking calmly. It made him sick.

"Yes!" Sasuke said, defiantly.

"Well, at least let me explain."

XxXFlashbackXxX

"I was sitting in the back of our car; our parents were driving me home from a shinobi exam, where I had come gold.

_We were driving calmly along, talking and laughing. _

_There was a blind corner coming up, but we wanted to go straight on. _

_Father began to… to pick up speed._

_As we began to drive over the blind spot, a black M3 came speeding around the corner. _

_As I looked out of my window, I caught a glimpse of the driver; a sixteen year old boy, with chestnut brown hair and blue eyes, talking into a mobile phone. In the passenger seat, was a girl, a little younger than me, with the same shade of blue eyes and purple hair, glancing anxiously up at him, before the cars collided. _

_I can still remember the way I lunched towards my window and banged my head against it, making the glass crack. _

_I lost conscious. _

_When I awoke, the car was upside down and my head was sticking out of my broken window. I looked back into the car and… I'll never forget the sight I saw… It still haunts me in my dreams. _

_Our… our parents were lying there, our mothers broken body was sprawled across our fathers. The blood from her mouth was dripping steadily into our father's blank, staring eye. _

_I crawled out of the window, and threw up onto the road. Strangers stared and some were on phones. _

_Looking over, I saw the little purple haired girl, staring in shock at her own car, her body covered in little cuts. _

_I looked at it too. _

_The image I saw… you'd never be able to imagine it. _

_Her brother's…corpse...was…was… splattered across the window screen, and you could hear a voice screaming from the phone._

"_Yuuto," The girl sobbed, sinking to the floor. _

_I went and sat beside her and put my arm around her, as she cried into my bloodstained shirt. _

_The ambulances came and prised us apart. I only just caught her name as the paramedics dragged me towards the vehicle. _

_I lay down on the floor of the van and wept. _

**Death:**** I was almost crying when I was writing the whole "Now, tell her it'll be okay," thing. And the flashback. *sniff***

**SQ:**** I actually looked away when Death wrote **_**splattered across the window screen **_**and deleted the thing that she wrote after. It was too gruesome. **

**Both:**** REVIEW OR… IT'S JUST TOO HORRIBLE TO SAY ANYTHING! We might write a parallel universe where Sasuke **_**does**_** actually pull the trigger on Hatsu… but may be not. It might be too upsetting. POOR ITACHI! 333 **


	9. Take Me Under

**Death:**** Hey everyone! We hope the last chapter didn't make you too upset. **

**SQ:**** *sings* Proper ninja rope with a proper ninja knot. **

**Both:**** *sings* Proper ninja rope with a proper ninja knot.**

**SQ: ****Make sure you say it with an English accent guys! **

**Death:**** Btw, neither of us has ever gone to court, so we're sorry if it's a bit slapdash. The next chapter will be better though! :D**

**9. Take Me Under**

XxXItachi+Hatsu+Naruto+SasukeXxX

Itachi untied Sasuke.

Sasuke stood and went over to the window, silently.

"You swear it's true?" he said, gazing into the black sky.

"Yes," came Itachi's calm voice.

Sasuke already knew it was true; the truth had been easy to read on his brother's face, but he needed to hear him say it.

"I was a fool!" Sasuke roared, so loudly it made Hatsu and Naruto on the other side of the room jump. "I was an idiot! I was a- a-"

"A Madara-loving, family-disowning, power-hungry moron," Hatsu said, matter-of-factly, whilst clutching her nose.

Sasuke swallowed.

"Yes I was!"

"Well, you can't say it fairer than that," said Naruto, holding out his hand to Sasuke.

Hatsu burst into tears. She ran forward, pushed Naruto aside and pulled Sasuke into a strangling hug, while he patted her on the back, awkwardly, his eyes on his brother.

Itachi went over and wrapped his arms around the both of them.

Sasuke grabbed Naruto and pulled him in to the hug.

The front door banged.

"WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED HERE?" shouted Kisame, slightly unnerved.

Hatsu grinned. "C'mere you," she said, pulling Kisame into the hug too.

"Kisame?" said the small voice of Sasuke.

"Yes?"

"I'll pay for the damages."

"Hahahahahahahaha."

"That includes my nose!" Hatsu said, over everyone's laughter.

The phone rang.

Kisame reached over Naruto's head and answered it.

"Hello?"

"_TOBI'S BEEN MISSING FOR TWENTY-FOUR HOURS! UN!"_

XxXMadara And Mysterious ManXxX

"They must be finished by now," Madara said, pacing the sitting room.

"Relax," the man took a drink from his glass.

"You can talk, _Hideyo," _Madara snarled.

"Sure, I can." Hideyo smirked.

"GET DOWN!" the door crashed open, and several agents came in, holding out their guns at arms length.

Madara got down and pulled Hideyo down with him.

_Uchiha Itachi, you shall pay for this, _Hideyo thought.

**XxXEveryoneXxX**

Hatsu squeezed Itachi's hand gently as they walked into the building.

They all stood there, at the top of the stairs waiting for the defendants to ascend, so they could go into the court.

"Apparently, they have a really good lawyer," said Kisame, from Itachi's left, pulling at his tie.

"Sasori-danna's better," said Deidara, squishing a clay model of Madara in his palms.

Everyone's eyes turned to watch Madara and Hideyo walk up the stairs assorted by police people.

When they had reached the top, Madara turned, caught Itachi's eye and smirked at him.

"Itachi – NO!" Hatsu screamed as Itachi broke out of the crowd, ran towards Madara and punched him squarely in the jaw.

Shocked, Madara fell backwards, tumbled down the stairs and landed in a heap at the bottom.

He sat up, dazed.

"STOP, STOP, STOP!" Hatsu screamed as Itachi ran down the stairs, jumped on top of Madara and began to hit and kick him repeatedly. Madara began to fight back, slowly regaining his strength, biting and spiting.

Hatsu was screaming, people were running, Hidan was swearing.

Itachi could taste blood, but he didn't care. All he cared about was inflicting more pain on Madara, than Madara was inflicting on him.

Itachi felt a pair of hands rip him off of Madara and slam him into a wall. He almost blacked out with the force of it.

His captor released him, and he limped back to where Hatsu was standing.

Hatsu slapped him fully across the face, so hard his head snapped backwards.

She burst into tears and flung her arms around his neck. Itachi sighed, and buried his face into her shoulder.

"I'm sorry," she kept whispering.

Finally they let go of each other. Itachi stroked her cheekbone. She smiled, took his hand and they made their way into the courtroom.

Itachi sat down, still holding Hatsu's hand. She gave him an encouraging smile and a small kiss on his cheek, before they faced the front.

"This court room is now in session," The Judge called and the room hushed.

Hatsu squeezed Itachi's hand.

"Itachi," she hissed as Madara stood and walked over to the box. "I need to tell you something."

"Do you swear to tell the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth?" the Judge said, as Madara laid his hand on the Bible.

"Shhh," He hushed her, squeezing her hand.

"But it's important!" she whispered franticly.

"So is this, love. So will you please be quiet?" he asked, through slightly gritted teeth.

"Yes," Madara said loudly, his voice ringing around the room.

"But it's about-" she began, forgetting to whisper.

"Will the witnesses please be quiet?" the Judge said, glaring at them.

Hatsu turned red, and went quiet.

Madara was standing in the box now, gazing coldly at Sasori, who had stepped out of his pew, in lawyer mode.

"Full name." Sasori said.

"Uchiha Madara."

"Age."

"Forty-three."

"Date of birth."

"December twenty-four."

"Members of family."

"Uchiha Izuna and Fugaku were my brothers. Fugaku married Mikoto, who had my nephews; Sasuke and Itachi."

"Can you please tell us where you were on the day of the alleged car crash?"

"I was at home with my nephew Sasuke."

"Right, and when Uchiha Itachi phoned from the hospital to tell you that your brother and his wife were dead, what did you tell Uchiha Sasuke?"

Madara met his gaze, unflinchingly. "I told him that his parents were dead, and that we were going to the hospital."

"Nothing else?"

"Nothing else,"

"Are you sure about that."

"Yes."

"Two weeks ago on the twenty-fourth of June, where were you at nine o'clock?"

"In my house."

"Who else was there?"

"Sasuke."

"Did you, or did you not, make a phone call to 080096333 at ten past nine?"

"Yes."

"To Takenaka Hideyo?"

"Yes."

"Why?"

"Old time sake," Madara shrugged off the comment, casually.

"So, a forty-three year old calls a twenty-nine year old for 'old times sake'" Sasori smiled, humourlessly. "How did you meet Mr. Takenaka?"

"We met at a business deal."

Itachi snorted quietly.

"So, after you made the call, Mr. Takenaka came over?"

"Yes."

"Why?"

"Because I invited him."

"And he came over to where your nephew, Uchiha Sasuke, and his friend, Uzumaki Naruto, were?"

"I didn't know Naruto was there."

"I see. And then you gave them a mission to assassinate Takenaka Hatsuko?"

"Not guilty." Madara said, calmly.

"So you plead 'not guilty'?"

"Yes."

"Take him down," the Judge ordered. Two guards stepped forward, put a hand on one of Madara's arm and lead him back to his pew.

"Witnesses." The Judge called.

One by one, alphabetically, Hatsu, Itachi, Sasuke and Naruto swore on the Bible, and then gave their testimonies. When they sat back down, Hatsu let out a slow breath. Itachi gently took her hand back in his once more.

Hideyo was called. He stood, took the oath like the others, and stood in the box.

Sasori took a sip of water and stood before Hideyo.

"Full name?" he asked.

"Takenaka Hideyo."

"Age."

"Twenty-nine." Hideyo leaned back, carelessly.

"Date of birth."

"First of March."

"Members of family."

"Mother; Takenaka Hanako. Father; Takenaka Hideki. Brother; Takenaka Yuuto."

Itachi stiffened, and his head slowly turned to look at Hatsu.

"Sister… well, she's here. Aren't you, sis"? He laughed coldly, looking at Hatsu.

Hatsu's face turned red, and she looked down at her feet, tears forming.

"Why didn't' you tell me?" Itachi asked, putting his hand under her chin and forcing her to look at him.

"I tried," she said, thickly. "I thought…. I thought…"

"You thought what?" he urged, gently.

"I thought you wouldn't want me any more," she whispered.

"Hatsu you are the most… I really don't deserve you," Itachi said, wrapping his arms around her and pulling her close.

Sasori motioned for them to face the front, they did and so did Hideyo, but not before he had shot Itachi a sneering look.

"Can you please tell us where you were on the day of the crash?"

"I was at home."

"Were your parents in?"

"No, they were dead."

"Ah, yes they died around the same time their son did. Where did they go?"

Hideyo shrugged. "I killed them."

The whole court erupted in whispers and struggles. The Judge barked for silence and it fell, uneasy.

Sasori swallowed and tried to continue his questioning. "Two weeks ago on the twenty-fourth of June, where were you at nine o'clock?"

"At home. Madara called me, I invited myself over and I went over. Happy?"

"Uchiha Madara said that he invited you."

"I guess his memory's going with old age. I. Invited. Myself."

"And you went over to where, Uchiha Sasuke, and his friend, Uzumaki Naruto, were?"

"Yes. Haven't we already established that?"

"I see. And then you told them to assassinate Takenaka Hatsuko?"

"Guilty." Hideyo said, calmly.

"So you plead 'guilty'?" Sasori said, amazed.

Hideyo smirked, and leaned backward, his hands resting on the edge of the box behind him. "Yes."

The courtroom exploded.

There were screams of delight and outrage. Madara was trying to claw his way past the guards to fight Hideyo. Itachi had pulled Hatsu out of the way of Sasuke and Naruto, who were trying to break the barriers that held them in the section.

The Judge banged her gavel and order slowly crept back into the building.

"Uchiha Madara will be taken to jail. Takenaka Hideyo will be hanged by the neck, for six hundred accounted crimes against the law."

Madara let out a scream of rage, while Hideyo shrugged, and said, indifferently; "Suits me,"

"Let me at him!" Hatsu yelled, trying to fight off Itachi's arms, which were wrapped around her waist to stop her from getting to her brother.

"Hatsu, if you kill Hideyo, though I wouldn't blame if you did, you'll be thrown into jail for murder and you may end up in the same cell as Madara," Itachi muttered in her ear.

All the fight went out of her, and she turned around and began to cry into his chest. Itachi rocked her gently, whispering words of comfort.

XxXOne Week Later: The HangingXxX

"Takenaka Hideyo, you have committed six hundred crimes against the law, you shall be hanged by the neck." The speaker said, as Hideyo walked up to the gallows, hands tied behind his back.

"Yeah, yeah, get on with it." He muttered, as he stepped on to the raised platform, above the trap door, and looked past the rope to the watchful crowd.

"Any last requests?"

"I'd like some water. Please."

A guard roughly shoved a glass of water into his hand. He drank it before handing it back, so hard it broke.

"Oops." He smirked. "I'd pay for the damage, but I'm gonna die, so find your own money."

"Any last words?"

He nodded. "Faites attention à petite soeur... N'arrivez pas à confortable."

The words; "What did he say?" echoed around the crowd, bouncing around like a ball. Everyone stared at him.

Then the man put the rope around his neck, tightened it and walked off the platform.

Hideyo smiled and caught Hatsu's eye.

She shivered and Itachi pulled her closer to him.

"Now," the Judge ordered.

There was a crack and his body dropped like a stone, swinging gently in the breeze. His face bloated and his last smile still upon his face.

XxXKisame's CarXxX

It was utter chaos.

Hatsu was sitting, asleep, on Itachi's lap. Sasuke and Naruto were in the boot, messing around. Deidara and Sasori were talking quietly. Zetsu was gazing out of the window, shouting at himself. Kakuzu was counting money. Pain and Konan were entwined on the backseat. Hidan was reading _Icha Icha Paradise _out loud, shouting. And Kisame was driving, his radio's volume on max.

Kisame parked and everyone bundled out and they walked into the mall.

"Can I blow it up?" Deidara asked.

"No," Eleven voices rang out.

Deidara pouted. "Tobi would've said yes, un."

"Well, Tobi's not here," Sasori reasoned.

Deidara picked up some clay and moulded it into a Tobi shape. "I'm just saying he would. Un."

"And I'm saying shut up," Hatsu said.

Deidara changed the Tobi into Hatsu and threw it at her.

Hatsu ducked and gave Deidara the _look. _

"One word. Then BOOM! Un." Deidara warned as they all squished into a lift.

"This lift smells funny. Believe it!"

Everyone sniffed.

Hidan looked at Hatsu. Her nose had been banged up in one of those bandages that made her look like a panda. He leaned over.

"You ani't styling that after me are you?" he asked, smirking.

"In your dreams," she said, dismissively.

Itachi chuckled slightly, wrapped his arms around her waist and whispered something in her ear that made her blush delicately.

"What did you just say to Hatsu?" Naruto asked, curiously.

Sasuke hit him over the head. "Shut up,"

The lift door opened and they all bundled out.

"I miss Tobi, un." Deidara said mournfully. "He's the only _fun_ one. Un."

Hidan gave Deidara the _look._

"Apart from Hidan, of course! Un!"

Sasori started to have a coughing fit that spread quickly around the group.

"Okay! You're all fun! Un!" Deidara said loudly. "Now, into _Clare's_. It's Tobi's favourite shop. Un."

They all walked into the shop.

Then the whole mall blew up.

Glass splayed over the running figures of people. Screams were heard everywhere as people fought at the doors, to try to escape. The building started to crumble, slowly. A slab of concrete crushed people from the upper floor fell down from the ceiling, then, or they were already dead from the force that they had hit the floor. The walls carved in. The Akatsuki stared in shock as the building collapsed around them.

**Death:**** Hahaha, we're evil! ;)**

**SQ:**** Evaaaaal!**

**Both:**** REVIEW OR WE'LL GET DEIDARA TO BLOW UP YOUR HOUSE!**


	10. Epilogue

**Death:**** Just kidding guys! We wouldn't really kill off everyone *cough-like Kishimoto-cough***

**SQ:**** We have a lot more planned! Oh, and btw, there are random lines all over the place, so try to ignore them. -.-' We couldn't get rid of them. DAMN IT LINES! (I'm not angry or anything…) **

**Death:**** This is the last chapter of this story but there will be a sequel.**

**SQ:**** Called: The Normal, The Sane, The Insane And The Abnormal. *Drinks coke* IT WENT UP MY NOSE! **

**10. Epilogue**

XxXEveryoneXxX

"I THOUGHT I TOLD YOU NOT TO BLOW UP THE MALL!" Sasori screeched at Deidara, as soon as they were all in the car and speeding away from the heap of rubble that used to be the mall.

"IT WASN'T ME! UN!" Deidara screamed, defensively.

"Thanks, Zetsu." Said Itachi and Hatsu.

Zetsu shook his head. "No problem."

XxXFlashbackXxX

_They all walked into the shop. _

_Then the whole mall blew up._

"GRAB HOLD OF ME!" Zetsu shouted at them all. Everyone laid a hand on him, as he sank through the floor.

They walked through the under ground, until Zetsu rose through the floor and they found themselves by the car.

"_EVERYBODY IN! BELIEVE IT!" Naruto screamed, happily. _

"_NARUTO THAT'S THE FIRST TIME YOU'VE EVER SPOKEN SENSE!" Hatsu called as Itachi tried to bundle her in to the back. _

_Naruto turned red. "THANK YOU SO-"_

"_YEAH, YEAH, JUST GET IN THE CAR!" Sasuke yelled, shoving Naruto into the boot. _

_As soon as they were all in the car, Kisame fishtailed around and hit over one hundred miles per hour to get out of the car park. _

XxXEnd FlashbackXxX

"Thank you so much Hatsu," Naruto called into the front.

Hatsu rolled her eyes. "Jeez, now he's _really_ gonna go to town."

"Let me take you out for dinner-"

There was a thump and they all heard Sasuke shout;

"PLEASE _DON'T_ TELL ME YOU JUST ASKED MY _BROTHER'S GIRLFRIEND_ OUT FOR _DINNER?"_

They all laughed as the sounds of a scuffle came from the back, with lots of thumping and several exclamations of "Hey!" or "Ouch!"

"Can we go and find Tobi, please? Un?" Deidara's small voice said.

Sasori reached over and ruffled Deidara's hair. "Sure."

Deidara gave him the _look _before smiling and perking up.

XxXThe Sahara DesertXxX

"SENPAI!" Tobi yelled, running slowly forward with his arms wide.

"TOBI! UN!" Deidara ran forward in the exactly same way.

"SENPAI!"

"TOBI! UN!"

"SENPAI!"

"TOBI! UN!"

"SENPAI!"

"TOBI! UN!"

"What are you doing?" Sasori asked, when they were a meter apart.

"We thought the slow motion running would… no? Okay. Un."

"And they say _we_ should get a room," Pein whispered in Konan's ear.

"SENPAI!" Tobi glomped Deidara.

Deidara blew up a figure behind Tobi's head.

"Tobiisrunningawaynow," Tobi said, sprinting away from Deidara, who ran right after him, throwing clay bombs after Tobi.

"DON'T YOU EVER DO THAT TO ME EVER AGAIN! UN!"

"Here we go again," Sasori groaned, face-palming.

XxXFive Hours Later; The AirportXxX

"What do you mean I have to take my piercing's off and put them in a tray?" Pein demand. "Do you know how many piercing's I actually_ have?"_

"WHAT ARE YOU DOING? GET OFF ME! SASORI-DANNA! UN!"

"Sir, you, quote, '_I'm going to blow up a plane next' unquote_" said the guard, dragging Deidara away from the rest of the crowd.

"I WAS TALKING ABOUT MY NEXT PIECE OF ART! I'M AN ARTIST! I HAVE A LAWYER PRESENT! SASORI HURRY UP AND SAVE ME! UN!"

"SENPAI!" Tobi yelled, running after Deidara's rapidly shrinking figure.

"SASORI! UN!"

"Sasori, I think you have a fan," Kisame said, nudging him.

Sasori sighed, and then walked briskly off in the direction where Deidara and Tobi had disappeared.

Kisame then walked through the metal detector, to join Itachi, Hatsu, Naruto, Sasuke, Zetsu, Hidan and Konan, who were all waiting for Pein and the whole Sasori, Deidara and Tobi situation.

"I SWEAR I'M TAKING LEGAL ACTION! THIS ISN'T OVER! UN!"

Sasori shoved Deidara and Tobi through the metal detector, before walking through himself.

They all looked over at Pein.

He was shirtless and trying to pull a piercing out of his arm.

"You know what? Just go through. I'll turn the alarms off. Go." The women said, shoving Pein's shirt back at him, as though it was caring some terrible disease.

Pein snatched his shirt and stalked over to where the others where, all laughing.

Konan was the only one with a straight face.

She walked over to Pein, ran a hand over his chest and murmured something in a low voice. Pein smiled and leaned down to kiss her.

"Oh, go get a room," Deidara and Tobi yelled in unison. "Un," Deidara added, as Pein's hand wandered over Konan's shoulder.

XxXThe Summer FestivalXxX

"How do I look?" Hatsu asked, turning in a full circle so that Itachi could see the full effect of her parasol and kimono.

Itachi smiled. "Gorgeous, but then-"

"Yes, yes, she _always_ looks gorgeous," Kisame finished, impatiently. "Now can we please go?"

They picked up the others on the way as they drove to the festival.

The festival was set up in a field with a river running through the middle of it; one half of the field was where all the stalls were selling items, then over the bridge, was the other half which held a stage for the performers and a dance floor.

They all climbed out of the car and melted into the crowd; each pair or trio going their own ways.

Itachi's arm curled around Hatsu's waist.

"So, the dance floor doesn't open until seven, about an hours time, do you want to just hang out here and look at stuff?" He asked, casually.

"Sure," She agreed.

Itachi went over to a stall.

"How much is two bands?" he asked.

"Sixty." The lady replied.

Itachi pulled out three twenties out of his pocket, and handed them to the lady. She took the money and handed him two green paper bands. He took them and wrapped one around Hatsu's wrist and the other around his own. The bands allowed them to go on any ride for any number of times.

They walked into the packed fairground and the Akatsuki went their separate ways.

"What do you want to go on first?" Itachi and Hatsu asked in unison. They laughed.

"How about we take it in turns, like, you say one and then I say one?" Itachi suggested.

"Okay," she smiled up at him, and he hugged her closer.

"You first." He insisted.

"Um… Ferris wheel." She suggested.

He nodded and they walked to it and showed their green bands to the woman manning the ride, she nodded them through and they went to take their seats. Hatsu slid in first and Itachi to climb in, but she slid to her side, refusing to let him sit down. He scowled, playfully, and leaned forward and tickled her. Hatsu let out a scream and laughed.

"Excuse me, sir? Can you please just get in the seat?" The woman called at him. Itachi smiled at her and Hatsu moved over as he sat down. Itachi took hold of Hatsu's hand as she rested her head on his shoulder, still laughing quietly.

The ride started up, they moved upwards and when they were near the top, Hatsu went stiff.

"What is it?" Itachi whispered in her ear.

"What am doing here?" she whispered, franticly looking around.

"What are you looking for?"

"A escape exit!"

"Why?"

"Because I'm scared of heights! Ohmyjashin, DON'T LOOK DOWN!" she screamed, burring her face in the crook of his neck and calming herself by breathing in his scent.

"This isn't funny." She growled.

"I'm not laughing." He protested.

"You are inside." She snapped.

"Right. Sorry. If it's any help, you're still my girl."

"Okay," she snorted. "But, uh, thanks."

She didn't look up until Itachi pulled her onto solid ground. She peeked from under his arm and then relaxed against him. They walked around the grounds until he spotted a water ride and pulled her towards it. They showed their bands and climbed into a log, Hatsu taking the front with Itachi behind her, wrapping his arms around her waist.

"If I break my nose on this ride, I'm blaming you." She warned him.

He smiled into her hair. "Sure."

The ride began to move along the water. There were gentle dips in the ride, in which Itachi arms would tighten around her and he would whisper; "Ohmyjashin, don't look down." in her ear.

When they finally came to the dip, Hatsu turned around and started to say that if she heard him say 'Ohmyjashin, don't look down' _one _more time she would - and then they tipped over. She turned to face the front and got lurched forward and her nose crashed against the bar.

"Are you okay?" he asked, as they climbed out, and her hands were wrapped around her tomato red nose.

"If it's broken, I'm blaming you." She said, thickly. "If it is, it would be the second time."

Itachi laughed and felt her nose gingerly with his own hands.

"It's not broken," he confirmed, before holding her close.

She rolled her eyes. "Thanks,"

"Your go," He said, kissing her temple.

"HEEEEEEY!" a couple of voices yelled from behind them, they turned and saw Sasori, Deidara and Tobi coming towards them.

"Hey, guys." Itachi greeted them, as they where a few yards apart.

"The knot?" Sasori asked.

"What knot?" Hatsu asked.

"The knot at home." Sasori said, smoothly.

"Erm… okay." Hatsu said, shrugging.

"Have, un-" Deidara started.

"You-" Tobi continuted.

"Asked, un-"

"Her-"

"The, un-"

"Question-"

"Yet, un?"

"Erm… no." Itachi said, glaring at them pointedly.

"What question?" Hatsu asked, even more confused.

"The question is… would you like to come over later?" Itachi said.

"Uh, okay." Hatsu frowned, slightly.

"Good. Come on," Itachi pulled her away from the trio, sending daggers over his shoulder back at them.

Hatsu looked around as they walked. She pulled Itachi to a stop at a stall.

"Would you win me a teddy bear?" she said, fluttering her eyelashes at Itachi.

"Sure," He smirked, and they walked forward.

"Hello," said the guy who owned the stall. Hatsu smiled at him, he was clearly not a local, judging by his Scottish accent that came out of his mouth. "Are you going to win the young lass a teddy bear?"

Itachi nodded, and Hatsu stepped to one side to watch. The Scottish Guy gave him three red balls and gestured for him to start. Itachi threw one ball and it knocked the top can off. Hatsu blew him a kiss, teasingly.

"She gave you a kiss, lad. Now you _have_ to win." The Scottish Guy said.

Itachi threw the second red ball and it knocked over the remaining two cans. Hatsu smiled at the Scottish Guy's shocked face and went over to Itachi's side and wrapped her arms around his waist, he smiled down at her and ran his fingers through her hair.

"Here's your bear, sweetie." The Scottish Guy said, holding out a honey coloured bear with a red ribbon wrapped around it's neck.

"Go and collect your bear, love." Itachi whispered.

"Aw, he called you 'love'!" the Scottish Guy exclaimed happily.

Hatsu rolled here eyes, and broke away from Itachi's embrace. She walked over to the Scottish Guy and took the bear out of his arms.

"Look after her, darlin'" he muttered as he released the bear.

She cradled the bear to her chest as she turned around and walked back to Itachi, who wrapped an arm around her shoulders, and they walked away from the stall.

"She's bigger than me." Hatsu muttered, juggling the bear in her arms.

"Let's just put it Kisame's car." Itachi said.

"Okay first of all, HER name is HUNI you twat and secondly, that's a great idea."

"Erm… thanks?"

Hatsu laughed and danced away from him. He reached out to her, but she slipped away from him. He chased her back all the way to the car and he caught her as she ran, wrapping his arms around her waist, so that her back was pressed against his torso and lifted her up. She gave a little scream of surprise and wriggled out of his grasp, laughing.

He pulled out the spare car keys and pressed the unlock button, and then opened a door. Hatsu placed Huni on a seat and Itachi shut the door again and locked the car. Hatsu took his hand and snuggled into his side. He kissed the top of her hair.

They walked back to the fair; Hatsu was not paying attention, until Itachi said "The House Of Mirrors" quietly.

They entered and walked down a dark corridor, until they found a ring of mirrors. They stepped into the ring, looking around at all the mirrors that disfigured their bodies.

"I like this place," Itachi smiled.

"Yeah, me t-" Hatsu said, tripping over someone's old drink carton. She landed flat on her back, her palms stinging slightly.

"I HATE being so clumsy!" she moaned.

"You're not _that_ clumsy, love." Itachi disagreed, smirking slightly.

"You're only saying that because _you're_ not." She snapped back.

Itachi knelt down so that they're faces were only a few centimetres apart.

"Yep, you're right. _I_ am not clumsy." He leered down at her.

"_You_ only like my clumsiness because when I land like this, I end up being wide open for you."

"How can you say that without blushing?" Itachi wondered out loud.

"Shut up." Hatsu hissed, turning a delicate shade of salmon pink.

Itachi chuckled, stood and went to stand by her feet.

"What are you doing?" she asked, suspiciously.

"I didn't know you owned sandals. I thought you only had flats." He said, staring down at her shoes.

"Well, now I have sandals,"

He laughed slightly, and then crawled slowly on to her, until his eyes were directly over her slightly shocked ones.

"Itachi, we could be arrested for doing this!" Hatsu hissed, as he leant down and kissed her forehead.

"Doing what?" he smiled as his lips moved down her cheekbone, to her jaw line.

"Doing what you're doing!"

He licked the tip of his tongue along her jaw, and then kissed her tenderly down her neck.

"I'm enjoying a romantic date with my girl in the House Of Mirrors." He whispered against the skin of her warm neck. "What's wrong with that?"

"You're. Trying. To. Get. Some. With. Me." She growled.

"Is that so?" he smirked, before gently kissing the hollow base of her throat.

Hatsu bit her lip and let out a small moan. Itachi opened his mouth and licked the hollow space in her throat gently.

"Itachi," she growled.

"Yes?" he said, teasingly, sitting up.

"Arrest that man for unlawful seduction!"

They both let out screams of freight and shock and scrambled to their feet, as they saw Kisame's face grinning at them out of a ring of mirrors, but they were unable to locate his actual position. Hatsu moved slightly away from Itachi, careful not to touch him.

"You're lucky I saw you, and not some stranger who WOULD arrest Itachi for attempting to rape Hatsu."

"Lucky _you_ saw us?" Hatsu shrieked.

"Yep." Kisame grinned at her.

"Nobody should have seen us!"

"Well, it _is_ public property." Kisame smirked. "You actually-"

"Will. You. Shut. Him. Up?" she snarled at the frozen form of Itachi. Itachi swallowed.

"How long have you been watching us?" Itachi asked, gingerly.

"Oh, ever since you came in."

"You mean-"

"Yeeeeeeah."

"Right. We are LEAVING." Hatsu grabbed Itachi's upper arm tightly and started to drag him out of the place.

"Have you asked her yet?" Kisame mouthed after them. Itachi shook his head as he was being pulled.

"Oh my Jashin!" she shouted, letting go of Itachi's upper arm, from where her grip hand left a slightly reddish mark on his pale skin, and walked briskly away from him and the House of Mirrors.

"Hatsu!" Itachi called, running after her. He wrapped his arms around her waist, trapping her arms to her sides. He pulled her to a tall oak tree on the side of the field and pushed her back against the tree, so that she was facing him. She looked down at her shoes.

"What's wrong?" Itachi asked, quietly.

She ignored him, and continued to examine her shoes with great fascination.

"Will you at least look at me?"

Silence.

"Miss. Takenaka, please may I have a second of your undivided attention?" he asked, sarcastically.

Hatsu looked up at him, defiantly.

"Thank you _so_ much."

"My pleasure." She snarled, matching his irritated tone.

"Now, will you please tell me what's bothering you?"

"Why don't you work it out yourself? After all, the stimuli of your brain connect twice as fast as the normal person. – Unquote."

"What?"

"Sasuke."

"Erm…"

"Now, can _you_ tell me what _you_ did wrong to make _me_ upset and angry?"

"I took you to the House Of Mirrors, you fell over, I caressed you and then Kisame saw us and you walked out. Is it that my friends are bad stalkers? No, you wouldn't get to upset about that. Oh…. You're mad at me for what I did to you."

"Yes. But don't you get that I didn't like it?"

"Like what?" he asked, confusion writing itself into his face and eyes.

"I didn't like what you did to me in there."

Itachi opened his mouth and then shut it again. He repeated the action several times.

"Sorry?" He said, making it sound like a question.

She gave him the _look_ and looked back down at her shoes.

"Are your shoes more interesting than me now?"

"At this moment, yes."

"I'm sure they feel honoured." He snapped.

"You betcha." She countered.

"Fine. I'll go tell everyone my girlfriend dumped me for a pair of sandals."

"Fine. I'll tell everyone that my boyfriend's gay and that he hasn't even _kissed_ the girl he's been dating for four years. Almost five."

Itachi's eyes narrowed. "You wouldn't. And, anyway, it's your fault. You were the one on the first date, who said that if I kept asking to kiss you, you would keep adding on the years. And we kept on getting interrupted!"

"I would. It's not my fault. Most guys just grab the girl and kisses her, you _asked_ me. Of course I was going to say no. Do you not know me at all?" She snarled.

"I was trying to be a gentleman. Last time I did that to a girl, I got stuck in a two year relationship, I didn't want!"

"So, you grabbed and kissed En'u and then dated her for two years, and on my date you freaked out and asked to kiss me five times. Okay."

"That movie was scary!"

"Was not! You're just a wuss."

"Am not."

"Are too."

"Am. Not."

"You're too much of a wuss to kiss your girlfriend for four years running."

"Am not."

"And why?"

"Because I'm about to kiss her now." He whispered softly, before kissing her.

Itachi's hands cradled her face as he deepened the kiss. Hatsu twisted closer to him, as she gently placed her hands on his forearms. His mouth was soft against hers and warm. She could taste the sweet taste of dango's in his mouth and mint toothpaste. He pulled away, smiling goofily at her as he pulled her close and buried his face in her hair. He smelt the aroma of her strawberry-scented shampoo.

They pulled back and smiled at each other. Hatsu tucked a piece of Itachi's fringe behind his ear, and kissed him again, with more force this time. Itachi smiled and responded eagerly.

"Hello!" said a cheerful voice from behind them.

They jumped apart and Hatsu stared down at her shoes again. Itachi smiled at her then looked to see who had shouted at them.

"Hello, Zetsu." He said, smiling stiffly at them.

"**Have you asked her yet?** Have you asked her yet?" They asked the question in unison.

Itachi shook his head.

"Ask me WHAT?" Hatsu yelled, at Itachi and Zetsu.

"Bye!" said Zetsu, sinking into the ground, rapidly.

"Shall we go to the bridge?" Itachi asked, lacing his fingers through hers.

Hatsu sighed. "Okay."

"Wow, that's so beautiful," Hatsu said, leaning against Itachi.

"It's alright," he said, unimpressed. "I wouldn't use the word _beautiful_ with you around."

She elbowed him, playfully, then continued to watch the sunset over the river, from where they were standing on the bridge.

When the sun had fully set, and the staff had lit all the paper lanterns, they walked across the bridge to where the dance floor was, and the first band where waiting for people to arrive.

When the place was fairly full, the lead singer said in to the mike: "Hello, Konoha City, we are Coldplay. And this is our song _Fix You_."

The band started the introduction to the song.

"Care to dance?" Itachi asked Hatsu, flirtatious.

"I'd love to," She responded, equally flirty.

She put her hands around his neck, while he wrapped his around her waist. They began to sway gently to the music. When you lose something you can't replace… When you love someone, but it goes to waste… Once they had slowly turned in a full circle, Hatsu laid her head onto Itachi's chest and she could hear his heart beat, slow and steady. She smiled. Itachi put his head on top of hers and held her tighter. She raised her head and looked into his warm eyes. Lights will guide you home… he smiled down at her, lovingly. And ignite your boats... Hatsu stood on her tiptoes and Itachi leant downwards. And I will try to fix you…

"HEY! CAN I DANCE WITH YOU NOW?" Naruto shouted up at them.

Hatsu caught her breath sharply. She drew, unwillingly, away from Itachi and turned to face Naruto.

"No, thank you." She said. Then she spotted a figure staring at Naruto. "Why don't you go and dance with that black haired girl over there; she seems to like you."

Naruto turned, spotted Hinata, went over to her and soon they disappeared into the throng of dancing couples.

"Come on," Itachi beckoned.

He led her back to the bridge, and they stood there for a while in silence, watching the fireworks.

Hatsu gazed out at the fireworks, entranced by the different colours.

"Hatsu?"

She turned to where the sound of Itachi's voice was.

He was kneeling on one knee, holding up a little black box, with a sliver ring with a blue diamond on top. She gasped slightly.

"Takenaka Hatsuko, I promise to love you forever, and as each day passes, my love for you grows. Will you marry me?"

"No." she whispered.

"Oh. Okay." Itachi paused, unsure of what to do now. "Erm, do you want to go back to the dancing?"

"No! I mean, yes. I mean, I meant yes but I said no and now you've got the wrong idea and I've completely messed things and just… Yes." She whispered the last word, smiling.

Itachi slipped the ring on to the fourth finger of her left hand.

Still holding her hand, he stood up.

Hatsu gently let go of his hand and wrapped her arms around his neck.

Smiling, Itachi wrapped his arms around her waist.

Itachi hesitated; he then gently pressed his lips to hers. He pulled her closer and she twisted her fingers in his hair as the kiss deepened. The tip of Hatsu's tongue gently traced Itachi's lower lip. Itachi held her more tightly, so that her feet were off the floor, until she wrapped them around his waist.

"I love you," he whispered, resting his forehead upon hers.

"I love you too," She whispered back.

**XxXThe EndXxX**

**SQ:**** Awwwwww! That really cheered me up after reading the alternative! (The Ghost Of You) **

**Death:**** I can't believe it's over! It's been a good few months. :) Hopefully you'll all tune in again to read our sequel.**

**Both:**** PLEASE REVIEW.. FOR THE LAST TIME ON OVER AND OVER. LOVE YOU GUYS XxX**

"I GOT YOU! BELIEVE IT!" Naruto yelled, spraying Itachi and Hatsu with a water gun. 

"You're too late," Hatsu laughed, still wrapped around Itachi.

Sasuke face-palmed.


End file.
